Coming Clean

Revelation in Progess

A little prayer, please

So, Lisa and I are trying to get our life more in order now that I’m out of school… it just seems like there is constantly something that is getting in our way. This weekend was suppose to be the big planning/organizing weekend… and Lisa got sick. At least I got the yard mowed and fertilized in time for the rain.

Now, I’m preparing to leave for Texas – returning Thursday evening. And this weekend is sure to be a full weekend.

So if y’all could, just keep us in your prayers. There are a number of things we’re trying to sort out and get planned and pinned down, and we can’t do it if we don’t have the time we plan for.

Thanks, dear reader. God bless.

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A Prince Without a Home

Shortly after the election last year, the Sage posted a message on the politics of Jesus entitled A King Without a Quarter.

It’s worth reading for yourself, but to summarize it briefly so you can get through the rest of this post, it asserted that Jesus was social not political. Not particularly mind blowing, but at the time when people were using religion as a means of divinely selecting a political party, it was important. There were a few other discussions on AYOR that surrounded it – especially the war – that made this whole thing particularly gut wrenching for me, but eventually I put it out of mind and got on with my life.

That was until after New Years this year. I can’t remember what prompted it, but I started to think about this essay again. The agitation and aggrevation that it caused in me earlier started to surface violently. Wouldn’t Jesus go to war? Don’t we have a just and righteous cause? …and that essay came screaming back at me: no, He wouldn’t. People are too precious to be sacrificed for causes and politics – the dealings of men. People are to be ministered to as we can – to be led to righteousness through Jesus and, in that, salvation.

What’s worse is that in all of this I found myself as a cog in the great war machine. The things I have worked on have motivated and aided the current war effort. And at the time I had nothing but pride for my work – blinded by the fact that my work, right or wrong, was justifying the death of some other human, some soul in need of redemption.

Now, I’m no commander-in-chief. The burden of what has happened is not directly upon me. Nor is the salvation of others my burden to bear directly. But my consent and participation makes me party to any soul who may be in hell right now because of my passive agreement to take their life in this time. If salvation is a communal affair… then our failure in these matters are also a burden upon us.

How am I to respond to this? What does this mean to me?

I then thought of – as I often do – the story of the rich young man. The rich young man approached Jesus asking how to find eternal life. Jesus said to obey the commandments of the Law, and the young man answered that he has kept the commandments since his youth. Then Jesus told the youn man to sell everything and follow after him, at which point the rich young man walked away dismayed because he owned a great many things.

I am a rich young man. I do my best to keep the commandments, and I have a great many things – much more by the standards of the whole world. And before I ever say that these things are of my doing, I acknowledge God’s blessing and providence in all my opportunities. I have no home – it is His before it is mine – and I gladly give it up when I should be called.

But now I find myself in a world of cognitive dissonance. I have a job under Caesar, for Caesar – an occupation of politics and not service to all mankind. The nature of how I came by these jobs is nothing short of God’s providence I do believe. They each came unexpectedly, easily, and most providentially. …but, in a world of guns, bombs, and wars… I’m working in some manner against the Gospel – against the ministry of Jesus, against seeking and saving souls.

And now, after having finished school, when my family is looking for some breathing space… I’m considering moving once again into something new… to possibly throw our lives once more into some kind of stress… I think they deserve more than that: some time to me, some time to peace, some time of stability.

The hardest part of all this for me personally, I’ve dealt with now. The hardest part was that, as far as I was concerned up until the beginning of this year, my current job is my dream job: simulation – games. And now I’m thinking of giving it up. Every thing that I had done to prepare myself for the real-world was for this specific kind of job, and now I’m going another way. It hurts. It’s disappointing. Yet it’s frightfully emancipating. It’s dying to myself and, hopefully, rising once more in Christ.

I don’t know what’s to come. As I told Sage, I think “it”, whatever “it” may be, is coming. I see two possibilities before me at the moment. I probably should look into them instead of letting them slip past me, and that’s the rub, right? If “it” is coming, you would think it would hit you over the head like a two-by-four, but I’m not certain God works so obviously – He certainly hasn’t so far in things such as these, though I see His hand guiding me in the choices I’ve had and, in part, the decisions I have made. For every opportunity I’ve had to lead me here, I’ve had other options. I think my choices, however poor, God has worked toward the clarity I have right now. And the funniest thing is that it’s not a clarity of action but a clarity of purpose. …I think, in general, we’d all prefer the former over the latter – it certainly makes things easier.

Now I wait, standing on the brink of a coming time, to more fully join the revolution of revolutions – to more properly join in and live for my Lord in pursuit of each fellow man. I pray for patience, I pray for wisdom, I pray an open heart, and above all, I pray that not my will but Yours be done. Amen.

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Writers’ Block

When I’m at work, running through everyone elses’ blogs, I get these ideas that spring into my head and write a whole blog entry in my mind right there.

…but when I get home… I can’t remember what they’re about. It’s annoying.

I’ve got a blog entry written somewhere in my mind about the music I listened to in highschool.
I’ve got a blog entry written somewhere in my mind about discerning your occupational calling.
I’ve got a blog entry written somewhere in my mind about discerning our spiritual calling – a post on justification and sanctification.
I’ve got the two other blog entries on Mary still forming in the back of my mind.
I’ve got a blog entry on moral development forming in the back of my mind.
I’ve got a blog entry on the permanent deaconate forming in the back of my mind.

All this stuff… I just write it in my mind to lose it. Very frustrating. Too bad I can’t be a professional blogger and get paid to do this.

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Marriage and NFP

So one of the conversations I had participated in lately (that I forgot to include in my previous post) was over at Josh about one Al Mohler and his views on marriage and “twixters”.

Something else that piqued my interest was a discussion about sex at Matt Lickona’s blog. Sex is a popular topic over there – namely due to the RCC’s “counter-cultural” stance on sex. Anyways, I posted my feelings on NFP. Instead of making you chase that, I’m posting it here – it belongs here. It is slightly edited from what I originally posted on Matt’s blog.

When I first got married, I hated NFP.

First, all of our other friends were newly weds and busy like rabbits (well, some left that impression anyway) but without the reproductive element. Second, we spent over three quarters of the time in the off-season because we were trying to be certain that we would not get pregnant. Those two elements combined caused me to really resent NFP.

But I think it was a good thing. Within those first few months, the stress of NFP made me re-evaluate the nature of (1) the relationship between my wife and me (2) children and (3) my trust in God the Father.

After 5 months of marriage, we became pregnant. It was not planned. It was not exactly a surprise. And it was, above all else, welcomed. Now I’m two months over 27 and nearing my fourth year of marriage with two beautiful children.

I still can’t say I’m a huge fan of NFP – like a child doesn’t like broccoli: it stands in the way of desert but you know it’s good for you – but I have a deep appreciation for it and highly recommend it. It has caused me to appreciate our bodies. It has caused me to appreciate new aspects of my wife and our relationship. It has caused me to embrace my children more properly as true gifts of God. And it forces me to actively live a sexual reality, that a lot of Christians don’t, which is accepting personal responsibility of my God given natural and good sexuality while also trusting in God’s providence regardless of what happens.

…and I don’t think you can have these kinds of earnest realizations about sexuality and family if you’re living in an artificial world that insulates you from the reality of sex.

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No More Homework, No More Books

No More Teachers’ dirty looks!!

Yes, I’ve completed the last of my course work for my master’s degree. It’s been a busy term, especially when you add in all the extra family stuff that’s happened.

I hope to get back to a lot of posts I started but never finished. I also want to write about all the stuff that’s been running through my head the past two weeks, but which school has kept me from writing.

…of course, now that school’s done… I think my honey-do list is about to explode :)

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Swimming With Scapulars

Swimming with Scapulars: True Confessions of a Young Catholic by Matthew Lickona and published by Loyola Press is a curious yet delightful work. Curious in that I found myself wondering – often out loud to my wife and friends – why write this book? Fame? Fortune? Evangelization? All of the above? Probably and yet probably not quite.

I can’t properly answer that question. But I can tell you why you might like to read it:

If you are motivated by any one of these, then this book is worth the read. Assuming I know my audience in some small way, I think they’d probably fit into at least one of these categories.

The last bullet above strikes at the core of the theme of the book. This is a book written by a Catholic to communicate his life in faith – a life he thinks is interesting and worth reading about. And in a lot of ways, he’s right about that.

Matthew Lickona is a man of (almost) 32 years, a column writer for an alternative newspaper (the San Diego Reader), a husband, and a father of 4 (soon to be 5). He’s no heavy handed or deep theologian. He’s not writing to persuade anyone of his beliefs; although, I imagine he’d be thrilled if even in some small way you were. This is not some religous tract or propoganda. This is Matt’s life of faith as a man in the pew who believes and obeys, as absolutely as he knows how, to the teachings of the Church. In today’s world where Catholics are reknown for their outright disregard and disobedience to the teachings of their faith, Matt brings something fresh to the table – though certainly not original. Matt strives to maintain the 2000 years of Christian believing, living, and teaching: he’s a Roman Catholic. No exceptions, no qualifications, no excuses for his faith.

The hardest part about being a Christian of the 2000 year-old variety is that there’s 2000 years of information and tradition to sift through and know. As a convert to Catholicism, I can personally attest that this makes it simply impossible to know it all. No one man can learn and retain everything about Catholicism, but through the faithful working together, the faith is preserved, practiced, and handed down to the generations.

In this context, Matt has been diligent as a member in the Body of Christ: where I have been ignorant or undiligent, Matt and his book have come and filled some gaps and taught me a number of things about Catholicism. The delight and beauty of his book comes from how he makes the teachings of the faith alive, fleshy, real. His subject matter is not strictly academic and never without its context: his topics are all motivated by something in his life. His presentation is full of reflection – on Scripture, on Tradition, and within reason – while remaining human – full of aggrevation, joy (though he doesn’t see it), concern, and hilarity.

Birth control, evangelization, sex scandals, the Eucharist… all of these topics and more I’m with my man Matt. He has concerns and doubts, all of which are properly cause for concern and reflection. I share in a lot of his weaknesses and shortcomings, and he relates the difficulties that lie therein as well as in moving past them. If there’s one area of disagreement, it’d be our preferred styles of worship – but I don’t think it a problem, really. I like interacting with people around me in my celebration whereas Matt doesn’t. I feel drawn in to the Mass and into our Lord when Matt feels driven away. Thank God for charity – the charity of the Mass and the charity we (ought to) give to each other. I think he and I would get by if we ever sat next to each other at Mass. But he didn’t talk about my number 1 distraction at Mass: my children. …Matt, c’mon… how are you not distracted and ripped from the Mass by your children?!?

For me, the real gems are those things which Matt introduced or reintroduced to me. Things such as mortification, alms giving, scapulars… and the moral value of cock roaches. These are things I have never thought about or fell by the wayside for any number of reasons. They are in some manner challenges to my life – that is they are challenges if Matt and I are honest when we say we take moral living and the teachings of the Church seriously. So, to Matt, thank you for bringing these teachings and traditions to me.

I’d probably recommend this book to anyone interested in Catholicism. Not because of its theological depth – I would say it does not wade out more than waist deep – but because of its reality. This book is about just an ordinary guy trying to be true to his Church and his faith, without exception or reservation, and why he is doing it – why it’s important . That’s what being a Catholic Christian means, and Matt makes a good example for our postmodern times.

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William is Baptized

How do I forget the obvious things?!?!?

So William was baptized last Saturday afternoon. He’s now free of original sin. He’s as perfect as he’ll likely be in this life. No personal fault upon him. No more guilt of Adam upon him. Just a concupiscent nature – a bent will – remaining because of Adam’s sin. How it will manifest, time will tell.

Josh comes into sin – though not knowingly so thus not wholly culpably – through curiousness and enthusiasm and bad example. I can help the latter, but the former two are his doom – I can only hope to curb it. And really, curiousness and enthusiasm are more a manifestation of his sense of independence. He thinks at times that he doesn’t need Mom and Dad nor do what they say. Makes me think of Adam and Eve – we don’t need to do what God says… this is more interesting… we know best for ourselves.

Anyhow, my children are now members of the Body. I hope I can instruct and inspire them to believe as those who have come before them and remain a part of the Body. Oh Holy Family – Joseph, Mary, and Jesus – pray for us. Our Father, hear our prayer.

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Introducing Mary

Mary. Yeah, you know her. Jesus’s Mommy. Jesus’s Mommy. So why is there such a controversy surrounding Mary? What’s there to not like about Mary? She is Jesus’s Mommy. We should love her as Jesus loves her – because we are called to love as Jesus loves.

The problem is Protestants don’t think about Mary like that. Before they can really consider anything concerning Mary, they see Marian devotion in the Roman Catholic Church and see that people are putting Mary up on a pedestal like they should be doing with Jesus – and Jesus alone. Well, the perception is wrong and over-reactionary… but I’ll get to that later. Protestants then wonder: How can a Christian Church put emphasis on someone other than Jesus? And if it were just devotion, that would be one thing… but they also have Traditions and theologies surrounding her.

But the thing of it is… …it’s really not that crazy.

Consider this:

Jesus is the most perfect person who has ever lived. Perfect such that He fulfilled the Law as no other human has. Perfectly obedient to the Moral Law which includes the commandment “Honor your father and your mother, that your days may be prolonged in the land which the LORD your God gives you.”

Now, before going further, it’s important to understand this commandment a little more contextually – namely, the Jewish context. I will point you here for a brief explanation of the commandment as it appears in Hebrew. The short of it is that the commandment calls for us to not just honor in the sense of “giving good reputation to” our parents but to also revere our parents. To, in a sense, bestow glory upon them from within ourselves as well as in what we do.

So, from this we enter into Marian theology. We enter into it because we are forced to ask: How do we reconcile Jesus, the perfect fulfiller and obedient follower of the law, and His relationship with His mother? If Jesus is to have a proactive reverence in heart as well as in action towards His mother, how would that be manifested… how far would He go?

And thus we enter into the Marian mysteries: the Immaculte Conception – that in the moment of Mary’s conception, the stain of original sin did not afflict her, and so she was born perfect – and her Assumption into heaven – that her body did not fall into decay and ruin but was assumed into heaven just as Moses and Elijah’s bodies.

Why am I writing about this? Well… this is something I’m not personally very clear about, so I’m trying, as I can, to put the teachings I know into my own words. And so that I can have a deeper appreciation of the Marian devotions I participate in. And so that, hopefully, as I make clear(er) these teachings and mysteries for myself, I can make it clear(er) for you, dear reader.

…and plus… I started thinking about it because I saw this recently: A RCC/Anglican ecumenical commission came out with a statement surprisingly and largely agreeing with the RCC teachings

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So what I’ve been up to lately

…so… it’s been quiet on the blog. I haven’t been wholly quiet in cyber-space – I’ve been spending my time on some other blogs.

For example, I was posting on Jimmy Akin’s blogs on how to handle the Rainbow Sash Pentecost “Demonstration”. I’m not altogether certain I was properly understood though I do believe I was heard and considered.

Then lately I’ve been active on Adam’s Blog. Particularly this thread on evangelization/discipleship, justification/sanctification, and individual/corporate salvation.

In other events, I officially graduated last thursday. yay me. no raise yet :(

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