I don’t know if I have had been so loaded with things on my mind until this point in my life.No wonder I’m braking out, its the stinken stress I’m under. If I could just pick one or the other the stress would go away, right? I don’t think so, I just think a whole new stress would come upon me. Its not ones fault but my own (well I could blame Carla to make myself feel better but that wouldnt help anything now would it? ). I literally feel like two people are pulling my arms in opposite directions. Both which look appealing to me, so which do I help the tug-o-war with? I effect people if I stay or if I go, which makes me feel loved. But then I don’t want to hurt anyone and ether choice I make, I’m going to somehow. I hate that. Its like I cant win or lose, isn’t there supposed to be some outcome? Its easy for you to say “The Lord will guide you”. I believe He will but that’s the difference between you saying that and me believing it. You got easy and I don’t. I still sit here, weighing the pros and cons, wanting, yet again a big billboard of a sign telling me what to do. God has never worked that way in my life, so why do I always expect Him to?