I’ve started this blog entry over many of times. I don’t know how to start it. I don’t even know the words to say. But I’m a bit frustrated with this side of the country in all that’s happening down south. Maybe its because I have many friends down there who are largely effected by this. Maybe its because part of my heart is southern now. Whatever the case, I haven’t hear a word about this disaster outside of my house. Why do people out here not care? Its not that they may not care, there’s a lot of groups trying to send help. With every other thing like this, 9-11, Tsunami, London, it was talked about. Why isn’t this being disused? Last night at youth group my friend Noah prayed for the people down south and it was the first ounce of conversation said about it. I was comforted that it was in prayer. I don’t know what to do for my friends down there who are without power, high gas prices, or trees in their home. It makes me sad to see a place I called home and hold dear is being torn apart right now. Like I said, I don’t have the right words or even forming my thoughts well on this. Simply, I’m just sadden by it all.
I’m sitting in Ashley’s room on this late Sunday morning. We debated about going back and visiting my old church but clearly didn’t make it there. But after showers and looking have way decent to enter into the world we are going to Crimson Cafe. Its been good being back, strange but good. Ashley has moved to the side of town I used to live at, off of the very street even. I think I’m going “home” almost since I’m with Carla and driving in Carla’s car. But then we take a right instead of left towards adorable Main Ave to River Run apartments where Emma would be waiting for us to walk in. Emma is still waiting for us, just in another city not as familiar to me as here.
The wedding yesterday was so sweet, I teared up a little during one of the songs. Not that I could hear the lyrics (we came right at 4pm and they started a bit early) but just the fact that two people who are dear to me where getting married. It was an outside wedding and the day was perfect for it. Most of my work family here didn’t know I was coming. That surprised me since a couple of them did and the way things fly around that place, its amazing they didn’t know. I didn’t catch the bouquet, but thats okay. My photos will follow after I return to the west coast were I am able to up load them. But, I’m going to steal one from Katie for yall to see.
Its bittersweet being back. This place is all too familiar and so many memories make me smile at the site of places. I miss the closest of friends here. Ones who I know who are routing for me in my relationship. I don’t have to defend anything about a long distance down here it seems (other than they wanting to find me a boyfriend here so I will stay here), they just cept that he makes me happy and thats good enough for them. Some new buildings have gone up, which is weird (nice big movie theater for one). Springtime in the south is one of the more beautiful things in this world. Along with spending lots of time with friends I have missed so much. There are few things that are sweeter in this life than this.
I cant believe very early in the morning tomorrow I will be on a plane to Alabama. I haven’t returned to my home of the southern states since my sad departure last July. It will be bittersweet returning, I’m sure. Good thing that I will be spending lots of girly time with Carla, which is long over due. There’s just nothing else like girl time… late night talks, coffee, Ed food, silly pictures, maybe even see if Emma has lost enough weight to sport an Alabama t-shirt! On top of that I get to see some friends that took forever to finally wake up and realize they belong together get married. Ah what a weekend it will be! I am a tad worried I will return with a slight accent that I normally pick up when talkin’ with my southern friends. Worried only because I would never hear the end of it from Jason, my family or my coworkers. Just think about calling a Starbucks drink (Iced Venti Non-fat Latte) with a thick southern accent – that’s funny. I’m ready for some good southern food (read: Cracker Barrel) and sweet tea. Lets hope the southern charm isnt too charming and I made it back to the west coast next week.
While living in Alabama Carla and I have a what you could call, quant kitchen. It small but did its job. Counter space became an issue quickly with are huge microwave (it was cheap and worked well, no complains from us!) and Monica (the coffee maker) a later addition Chandler (the espresso machine) and of course our personal cute touches (a kinda scary picture of us with Moses in face masks and some candles). We dreamed of decorating our future homes someday in that kitchen (well, I know I did at least) and I always thought a coffee theme kitchen would be a lot of fun. Not cheesy coffee cups everywhere, but a nice coffee shop type feel, with shades of browns and creams. Ive seen pieces I want to buy and store till I get to have a place of my own to decorate. But Ive made the rule (for the respect of not taking up my whole parents garage of my storage stuff) of only if I really think I couldn’t find it again or if just a really really good deal that I cant pass up. So far, I only have two things which I actually keep in my room, so all is well in that department.
Well, all was well till my mom and I visited a store called Sur la Table (its french, as Jason reminds me of how to say it everytime I tell him about but to me it still reads “Sir La Table” not however the french say it) and that’s when I fell in love with the famous red dishes. I didn’t know what they were or where they had come from but I held a plate in my hands and just adored the deep red that my eyes feel upon. That was it, I had to have them for my kitchen. But wait, my coffee kitchen with red dishes? How could this be? Would they go? I showed my mom find and asked her the question that nagged inside. Would these two loves of mine really work, I was doubting my scene of correlation. She said yes, they would bring a nice touch of color to a brown tone kitchen. And that’s how Ive come to make Waechtersbach’s line of dishes my “red dishes” as call them everytime I’m at a store that carries them “I going to go visit my dishes.”
Last week when visiting with Polly I peered into her kitchen cupboards and saw red gleaming from the corner of my eye. I opened it up all the way and pulled out a dish (squared even) and turn it over to look for the Waechtersbach’s logo imposed on the bottom. There is was and all its glory. Then I realized, Polly and I had never shared this love for red dishes. When she got married she registered for a lot of cobalt blue and white items and Pier One. That was in their studio apartment, but I guess now they live in a house, red dishes are for them. I told her about my love for the red dishes that graced her shelf’s and she said “I got them for like two bucks at Ross.” My eyes lit up with delight. If you don’t know what Ross is, its like a TJ Maxx or if you don’t have that, its like a really really cheap Wal-Mart, but with designer items. Waechtersbach’s dishes go for at least 8-12 bucks a plate, depending on the size, etc. So 2 bucks was most definitely a deal. Actually, it was a steal. I made my journey over to Ross as soon as I could to seek the treasure.
I found a mug, a bowl and a big plate once I arrived. I got way to giggly. After having all three items in my hands, I realized that the mug and the bowl were chipped. Oh but I didn’t want to put them back for only around two dollars each. But then I remember the whole storing issue and sadly, put them back. Another item Ross had was these plates that looked in certain light just like mine. But if you turned them over there was “Made in Spain” marked on them. I want German plates, not Spain. As much as I wanted to take the mug home just to have on my desk as a pencil holder, I decided against it. It would be almost sadder to have chipped dishes than none at all. Also, it made the red plate all that more special. I came home with my red plate and showed my mom. She actually sold me on the idea of these dishes being that “I could always replace ones that brake” if I used them as my main dishes.
Apparently, my grandma, who loves finding a good deal heard about my Ross find. She’s a frequent shopper at Ross, especially on Tuesdays when she gets her extra 10%. This is one thing I don’t understand about my Grandma. She lived through the tail end of the depression. I remember when I was little not finishing my plate and my Grandma would think it was a waste and eat it. The other night when we had dinner out, she wanted to doggie bag the other table’s food. She doesn’t like to be wasteful. But if something is on sale, whether she needs it or not, she buys it. Her apartment is full of good deals she just had to have. When finding out my dishes were at Ross, she took it upon herself to look for them for me. Sadly, she mistaken them for ones that read “Made in Spain”. I felt so bad to tell her they weren’t the right ones because they looked so close in color. Despite the failed attempt, she said shed keep her eyes out for my dishes just the same. It was quite sweet. So, until then I will have on lone dish… standing tall, waving boldly in the corrupt sands of commerce. And my dish answers “I am a lone reed.”
Being away from home last year it seems I did so many more Christmas things then I did this year. I cant believe it was only a year ago there was 20 people in my apartment in Alabama for the Gospel Supply Christmas party. It was so cold outside, but it was so hot inside from all our warm bodies. We hand a blast with too much food for our little ottoman that served as our coffee table. We played a very fun, even if it was long, game of guessing who a certain fact belonged to what person in the room. I have some video clips on there I love to watch, it makes me laugh everytime. Carla and I went to Dickens downtown which was held on Main Ave in our very own downtown Northport. We played in “snow” and looked at all the little shops and the carols dressed in Dickens time period. We found “our house” that was this traditional southern style house where that you can rent out for parties and events. This very day last year, I drove around with Brian and Amy, along with Brian’s parents looking at Christmas lights after going to a Christmas Eve services with them. We also had supper at Brian’s parents house, where they made me feel like one of the family. Brian’s parents lived off the street I lived on and told me I was welcome to come by any time, and I knew they meant it. Then I got share Christmas day with Kerry’s family. He made sure I wasn’t alone with Lunis (the Christmas tree) on Christmas morning, so he invited me over. When they got together to open presents I really was looking forward to just watching them open theirs. When his daughter brought me a present from their family I thanked them since they already gotten everyone at the store something. Then presents kept coming and coming. Couple tears escape at the site that was in my lap. My work family loved me more than I ever though. I hope that doesn’t come out in a shallow way, they didn’t need to get me presents for me to know this, but it was very touching. As much as I wanted to be home, last year was one of the best Christmas I ever had. I’m getting emotional thinking about it and how much I miss those people who warmed my heart so much.
The last two morning while getting up at a mighty early hour I have come to discover none other than frost on my window shield. Yes ladies and gentlemen, frost. Ive woken up to high 30s to low 40s weather, which is way too cold for southern cali, and my house which is 3.3 miles from the sandy coast line. Now, I expect it to be like this when I go to North Carolina on Tuesday, but we California’s do not pay good money to live by the sea to get frost! Also, I cant get the knob on my car to turn to heat, so that makes for a very chilly ride to work in the mornings. Scarf and mittens are my weapons. I may also have to start wearing a beanie because my poor little ears have no defense in such conditions as these.
Id like to welcome to the family a new member. He (its silver I guess its a he) was brought home for my dad as a play mate more so than a son or brother. He is the digital Barista espresso machine. Originally the thought was bring a cute, not bad amount of money (after the lovely partner discount) cherry red espresso machine. The thought was when I move and get my “house” (it can be in many forms) and get my red dishes, and red Kitchen Aid and red toaster… you get the idea… that the cherry red espresso would be an nice addition to my future kitchen. Well, I think others had an idea similar to mine because they are completely sold out in the company! Cant you believe it?! (Kenya… oh sorry…) So my parents, somehow thought a machine almost the same amount as the refrigerator would become the newest thing to cover our counter space. He seems happy so far, though he’s a bit louder than Id hope. Well see if he grows on me.
God knows I miss the south greatly. He takes good care of me in the form of Chick-fil-a. The first in San Diego county (if not the state, I’m unsure of this fact so don’t quote me) opened this morning to folks spending the night in the parking lot to be one of the first 100 people in the doors for free Chick-fil-a for a year. Need I remind you of the temperatures we have been having here at night and early morning? Is it really worth free chicken for a year? I wouldn’t say no, but, maybe the sweet tea. Of course I was overly excited to hear of this news, part of the south coming to me right behind my house (6 minute drive) and took my mom for dinner. She was sadden that biscuit sandwiches are only served in the morning, though she has never had Chick-fil-a. The day we thought of going there when I lived in Tuscaloosa was on a Sunday. As you all know, they are closed on Sundays (even here where everything is open, even Christian bookstores, on Sunday) so she wasn’t able to know the wonders of Chick-fil-a until this evening. Its wonderful having sweet tea running through my system again.
I haven’t been posting due to my computer getting new RAM from my ever so gracious parents and my ever so slow poke of a brother installing it. Apparently my parents computer doesn’t have cookies. Making cookies would make it so I could check my email and even log in to be able to blog. I’m on my brother’s computer, which apparent has lots of good cookies cause its allowing me to make this post (don’t tell him I was in here. He really wont finish my computer!). So if you read this and have emailed me, I haven’t gotten anything that’s been sent to me over the past few days. I’m quite sad about it too.
Its been raining for a full three days now and I love it. I love the rain I’m realizing. I started a new journal last night (its really cute, has a picture of a girl drinking coffee and it says “Cafe Girl” below the photo) with my thoughts on the rain and how it effects southern Cali folks. We freak out which is funny to me since I’m still waiting for weather warnings to go off telling me to get to my safe place, as if I was still in Alabama. Its not much colder ether, which makes me sad. I forever now wish when it gets fall it gets cold like it did in Alabama. But, I do have a sensable reason to bust out my scarfs. Yes, rain means scarfs, don’t mess with me and my scarfs. Its sometimes hard to look cute in warm outfits cause your layering and trying to be warm and dry over cute. So, naturally, a cute scarf is a useful and helpful accessory to making a “winter” outfit cute. I have not yet worn a scarf but Ive seen others doing so, which means I’m more than allowed to do so.
I also started “Mudhouse Sabbath” last night and LOVE it. I’m only to chapter three, but find so much connection between the effects of the rain on me and this book. The first chapter about setting a day a side. To me as a Christian Ive never taken time during 6 days to prepare for one. It seems like a neat part of the Jewish walk, the way she writes about it at least. The rain makes people slow down, wether staying home more or taking time and preparing to go out in the rain. Theres no spiritual connection there, but I found that I could apply that to my rainy days if I tried. Mudhouse Sabbath, when she explained the title, warmed me. Mudhouse is a coffee shop in the authors home town which she spends, in her version of Sabbath, time of rest there. I used to do that, escape to a coffee shop for some rest time. I did that not too long ago at The Living Room in La Jolla. Sitting in the rest that I can really only breathe in deep and know deep down in my soul is at peace really during those times. Ive stopped to study the rain a lot over the past few days, even for a brief moment have found myself more at peace. I’m in awe of His creation which San Diego has been without for six months. It brings me back to the simple truth that I know for my heart to be still and walk on the Lord’s leading, I have to rest. The rain has just really been the final puzzle piece in all the little whispers in my life telling me that lately.
I remember why I love the south so much, the pace of life. I have been on the go ever since landing in Cali. Things to do, people to see. I’m not used to people being everywhere and they drive too close here. Back off, and get in your own lane, this is mine. Oh, and I apparently have a southern accent. If I have a southern accent, well, they better not dip their toes in the south cause, they’d fall face in southern drawl.
Ive been in San Diego for almost 3 full days and I have only had Mexican food once. ONCE! This is not okay. Did I get used to being without it? Maybe its because I haven’t hung out with Pols yet, her and I always get massive amounts of Mexican food and eat like we never ate before. But only her and I, not when I’m with anyone else. And I love the fact I see Mexicans and hear Spanish all the time now. There’s such a mix culture in San Diego, making San Diego so great. Nothing against Alabama, but there really was just black and white folks there. While in the south I bought the stereo-type that people in Cali are “rude”. I mean, there’s something about southern hospitality. Being out and about, San Diego is really the big city with a small town feel. We have friendly people, I don’t know what out-siders are talking about. I miss sweet tea desperately though, I’m gonna go make a pitcher.
You know whats one of the more sadder things in life? A blog that just sits there, all a lone, with no update. I mean I click over to my friends who I shall not name *cough* Ashley *cough* Carla *cough* Kathleen *cough* Brandon *cough*…excuse me, I don’t know what that coughing fit was about. But we all have these friends, who have a wonderful thing, such as a blog, but yet, fail to update it. I mean is it really a blog anymore? A blog is an active thing is it not? And when its not active, then it isn’t a blog. Its a Golb. And NO ONE wants a Golb, it just makes you sad from head to toe. So as a public service annoucment to all bloggers everywhere, I am just telling those who I will not name, and you probably know who you are, to please, for the sake of bloggdom, update! This world is scary place as it is without Golbs running around everywhere.
So, I got my “puppy” in the mail yesterday. I spend way too much time playing with it and figuring out how to use things. Everyone on Verizon, its a free call, we should catch up. Can you hear me now? Good. (Sorry, that was so lame) I also drove into “Shes Out of Control” last night. Poor Jace got an earful about it since I’m not allowed to talk about the book at work so I don’t ruin it for my coworkers who are going to read it. And what I’m about to say doesn’t ruin anything, its on the flippin’ cover, but Ashley Stockingdale got a puppy. So look at that, she got a puppy and I got a “puppy”. Yeah, I probably will end up calling my cell phone puppy. I don’t think this is good. I blame Jason. I also blame him for showing me a website where I download new rings. Not that 36 isn’t enough, but I mean these are some fun (and scary) rings that are just too tempting not to download.
Todays my last day at Gospel Supply. Doesn’t feel like it though. And I mean, I’m going to make special trips over there tomorrow and Friday to say good bye to people, so it doesn’t feel like I’m leaving. I couldn’t even begin to think life in Alabama without my job there. I know its just retail, but I made some of my closest friends working there. Id like to sit here and recall a ton of fun memories over the past 10 months Ive been there, but that may just make me cry and its too early for that. But yall mean the world to me, and when I can collect my thoughts without tears, then I will blog about yall (thank you again Katie for your sweet blog entry). Until then…Preeshate it!
Today was my last day at Vineyard. I’m still wondering how Jason knew something was wrong with me at the end of worship. I mean I was fine, just sad cause it was my last time there. Amazing how he knows when something is up with me already. That boy can read me so well. But I had many people plotting on how to get me to stay. I want to stay so badly. I feel so pulled talking to people here and then getting phone calls from friends back in Ca. I want to turn off my cell phone and not leave my apartment. Maybe then if God is saying something different I could hear Him. I’m still have plans to finish packing tomorrow afternoon and start the major house cleaning (which isn’t too bad since I just cleaned for Jace) during the other days. And of course spending last moments with friends here that probably the soonest Id get to see them will be football session. I mean who wouldn’t want to tail-gate with Amy and Brian? That’s what I thought. Uhaul is being held with my name on it for Friday pick up. I guess when Justin said “Well have coffee at least once a week before you leave” meant “I’ll show off my muscles by helping you move your heavy stuff and use my pretty truck”. My Dad will be ether driving down from a business trip in practically Kansas on Friday night or Sat morning. What a great Dad I have that would drive all that way then drive three days straight with me. I am so thankful we agree on music, I might go mad if we didn’t. I’m listening to David Wilcox for the first time this evening. This guy is great. Great, great, great. I like Christians who can sing about their faith in one song and sex in another. I might have to pick up one of his records for the road trip. (If you want to listen to him, he has two albums streaming on his website) Along with a stack of books to read too. I plan on rereading “Prayer and the Art of VW Maintenance” by Don Miller, perfect road trip book since its about a road trip in the same area I will be driving. Don Miller, if you happen to read this, thank you for writing books, I really appreciate it. Speaking of books, I’m going to go finish a book that was due today before I let me heavy eyes shut for the night.
Ive started to pack already. I move in a month and I don’t have that much stuff that it would take me longer than a total of maybe 3 days to pack. But packing now, is SO me its not even funny. While on a late night phone call last night I started taking down frames. This one of the most depressing things. Ever. Its like there is no people in my room. Decorations are just the most practical thing to pack because I don’t “need” these things for the next month. I also started sorting through clothes. I have to much emotional ties to my clothes. I told myself if I hadn’t worn it since moving to Alabama, its probably time to get rid of it (good rule to go by). I have a sweater that Ive had since my Freshmen year of highschool that I just put in the get rid of box. Now I’m not that old, but freshmen year, that was 8 years ago. I don’t think I should have a sweater for that long at this early in my life. As hard as it was for me to put it in the get rid of box because its been around so long, its time.
I’m getting rid of a lot of big things this move. Being I’m moving into my parents house, there’s no need for me to move across the country hand me down furniture. One of those items that I’m giving to a friend of mine is my bookcase. She asked me yesterday when I wanted to make time to get to her house. Now, my bookcase, its not nice, its been around for little over 10 years. Its from IKEA. If you aren’t familiar with IKEA, they have cheap furniture, that looks nice but doesn’t last long. So its pretty much a miracle that my bookshelves has moved three times and still standing. This time around though I nailed it together and its quite ugly on the sides (under the pretty curtain I put over my nail mess). Ive warned Chalene (my friend who wants it) its state. She just really wants to get her books out of boxes and onto a shelve. First thing I packed during my last move were my books. This wasn’t so wise because I found myself opening the boxes back up because I wanted to read something. Ive collected a lot of books over my time in Alabama, more than I normally would in 10 months. This is what I get for working at Christian bookstore. I love my books, like Ive said many times before, they are my friends. I told Chalene that Id let her know when she could come get it.She should understand as much as she wants her books out of boxes I don’t want mine in boxes. My books probably be near the end of the list of things get packed. Is there something wrong with me?
“Sometimes I wonder about my life. I lead a small life. Well, not small, but circumscribed. And sometimes I wonder, do I do it because I like it, or because I haven’t been brave? So much of what I see reminds me of something I read in a book, when shouldn’t it be the other way around?” ~Kathleen Kelly, You Got Mail
First things first… the non really deep thoughts, but things I have been noticing. Summer is upon us and its humidited. Some how, I had forgotten how warm it gets here in Alabama. I know, amazing right? But it was flippin cold this winter (I’m a Cali girl, it was cold *sticks tongue out*) and I’m still not used to seasons. I don’t normally wash my face at night, other than to get my mascara off, but Ive been washing my face nightly due to it feeling so greasy from it being so warm. Once I do, my face is dry and I feel it pulling. I think my face happy when its oily instead of dry, but it just makes me feel so gross. Also, people who have lived in Alabama most of their lives must be really used to the warmness that we experience because twice yesterday in the icky hottness I was stuck talking in it! When theres air-condition available, please, for the love of God and all that is holy, lets use it!
Onto the deeper ponderings… so I got to hang out with a friend whom I haven’t spent quality time with (ie my love tank in that relationship was pretty close to empty) the other night and it was great. We talked about all sorts of things for hours. I drove home thinking we hadn’t hung out in a while but we still sat there and talked like we had hung out everyday. My friend was the one who had the idea of us hanging out that was long over due. I guess I was just surprised that this person still wanted to hang out with me. I know it wasn’t because of anything ether once of us had done. But when we made plans to hang out, that said to me that my friend simply just enjoys being around me.
What I’m trying to say is that I’m just surprised I have friends at times. I don’t think of myself as a person who has problems with self-esteem at all. Nor do I think I have a hard time making friends, not to be all big headed at all, but, I seem to be a pretty likeable person. I had someone be nervous around me this week, I am no one to get nervous about! As much as this person might of been in the most uncomfortable feelings when nervous, it really touched me.
It just amazes me at times when people really genuinely enjoy me. And not just some face I put on to make them like me, but me. This is something that really made me think it was a good idea to say “yes” to my first boyfriend’s plea of moving our relationship forward. We really got to know one another on a week long backpacking trip where we did not have showers, got very dirty and saw each other fresh out of our sleeping bags every morning. If a boy still wanted to date me after that, then theres probably something special about him. I don’t know if that makes any sense to anyone, I could go on a tangent in a bunch of different ways about friends (a good tangent) but I don’t have time right now. I’m off to trend waters where I almost drowned.
I had a pretty good day today, even with a 12-9 shift (my days are usually shot when I work that shift). I went to drop off Hope at the car doctor to check on her breaks and rotate her tires. Something I have been putting off for a while merely because I hate car stuff with a passion. I hope I marry someone who will take my car in whenever it needs it and fill up my gas tank. My friend filled up my gas tank once instead of making me get out and pump it. I thought to myself I could get used to this. Hey, if Derek’s grandma can turn someone down because he cant dance, I can hold out for someone who pumps gas. Anyways, on with my day. So, Carla (be the great roomie she is) takes me and we go over to Wal-Mart so Briley could get an oil change. So we killed some time by looking for a coworker’s registry. We found the last episode of Friends on sale for $7.87, and of course I had to get it. Briley is all good to go and we drive back to the car doctor where Hope is at to find out that my appointment meant squat and they had been “snowed under” and hadn’t got to my car yet. I wasn’t real thrilled because I had to be at work in about an hour and half. Carla (again being the great roomie she is) drove me to work then later called to tell me the car doctor said Hope was all ready. They were suppost to call me at work first all. Second of all, they were suppost to tell me if my breaks needed replacing. I give them a little ring and they tell me Hope’s breaks are fine (yay! no big money spending on Hope!) and they close at 5:30. My coworker offered to drive me over to get her. I appreciated it greatly so Carla didn’t have to drive into town to get help me, but I wished that appointment meant something you know? So I was kinda disappointed walking in, but then they didn’t charge me anything. I left happy.
Work was fine, kinda slow, nothing exciting to report. I was in customer service, which I enjoy. April from church came in to get her check for helping us wrap during the crazy Mother Day’s weekend. I had wanted to go to a softball game that my church played and knew April was on the girls team. She even asked me if I wanted to play. I told her she didn’t know what she was asking because I’m horrible at sports. She said they weren’t very good it was just for fun. I went and found them after work, and it really was fun. I didn’t know what field they’d be playing in, but I knew they had gray shirts. I walked over towards the gray shirts then I heard my friend Katie yell. If you know Katie, you know her yell from anywhere. I knew I had found them. I sat and watched them play and then started seeing the husband and boyfriends who are on the guys team show up. It was so cute, when the girls where waiting for their turn to bat, they’d give they’re dirty, smelly, sweaty guys a hug. I sat and watched about half the game before walking over to the otherside of the park to find my friends Chalene and Justin. Justin plays on their churches team and I knew a lot of the guys because I used to attend their bible study. After both games ended, I walked to my car, not needing a sweater or anything (which is still a strange concept to me, go out at night and not need a sweater of some sort) having the thoughts of how much I loved this.
What did I love so much? The small town-ness I was feeling. The car place, I went there because my friend’s dad told me to go there. He knows the owner, he wouldn’t want me to go anywhere else. They didn’t charge me, which was the first for a car place to me. I know softball games go on all over the country, but it was my friends out there playing. It was a social thing to do, go see them play, weather they were good or bad. I drove home satisfied with my small town day.
If I didn’t know it already, I officially now know I live in the south.
Tonight, I listened in on the youth group’s lesson and the youth pastor said:
“Jesus loves y’all!”
I had to refrain from giggling. Yall?! Isn’t it, Jesus loves you?
But, like I said, I’m in the south, so, remember Jesus loves y’all.
I haven’t had bangs in ten years, if not more. Ive been talking about getting bangs since my friend Kari cut bangs last winter. I even took this picture in with me today when getting my hair cut. (I wanted a mix between Kari’s bangs and Sandra’s grown out look , which is what I think I got.) Of course I had to bring support of Carla and Ashley with me, or else I would of chicken out. I’m bad when it comes to cutting my hair more than an inch. But I did it and I have been messing with them all day.
That was the first of the Ashley, Carla and Alisa adventures today.
After poking around the mall for a little bit (I bought a cute black top from GAP) we drove over to Crimson Cafe for 1/2 price coffee and a board game. We played Worse Case Scenario and it was a lot of fun. We learn lots, you know, in case we need wrestle an alligator or know what to eat if in a jungle. I won by the way. And I just realized, I beat Carla. I take a little bit more glee in that then I should. Ashley left us for a thing at church and Carla left shortly there after for a church thing as well (church, pshaw )
In the late evening, Ashley came over to our apartment were we watch some Friends on DVD while eating cake and popcorn. We were very girly and a fun evening. We did originally have plans for a pool day, but rain cant stop the adventures of Carla, Ashley and Alisa!
I also had two very interesting phone calls today. First one from my little brother who NEVER calls me. He wanted to know about living out side of our parents house expenses. I gave him thoughts on that and asked what was up and if he was moving out. We had a good chat over some issues he iss facing with our parents. While listening to him I remembered the feeling of wanting freedom. I don’t blame him where he’s at (in wanting that freedom), he just needs lots of prayer and guidance right now. If he moves out, it will just be so weird to me, like he’s really growing up or something. (When he drove, that freaked me out. He’s got a 2 year plus girlfriend, which also freaks me out.)
I wanted to hear my parents view on this, because I knew there was one but didn’t call them right away of course.(My brother would of figured if the phone rang right away and it was me. ) My mom actually called me just to call and we had a good conversation about whether I’m going to be staying in Alabama if/when Carla leaves. She didn’t try to talk me into moving back, which is the first. It helped me a lot to know she saw where I was coming from and that she supported me ideas. It felt more than just a mother daughter talked, I cant put my finger on it. I just know when I got off the phone I just felt loved in many ways.
“Rain rain don’t go away
We need you this dry and dusty day
Rain rain don’t go away
Though some may say please go away
Like the April Showers on the slick cement
And the roads once straight have now become so bent
Weaving through the trees of vain security
Rounding round the hard rocks of hard morality”
“They all want an answer. I wont say a thing. Time wont be our master who died and made it king?!” ~Tara Leigh Cobble
Conversations are quite an interesting thing. Ive had few over the past few days that really have impacted me. Some Ive allowed to be a big deal when I shouldn’t have. Others I probably should let them effect me more than they have. These conversations have been corner stones on the foundation of fresh friendships in my life. Im still developing 9 months relationships that I thought were further in my mind but Im comfortable where they’re at. Do I have any close friends just like I do back in Ca here? Id have to say no. I have friends here that I consider close friends, but not as close as some back in Ca. I cant expect that! The relationships in Ca are built on over 6 years of history. Comparing them and the new ones now is comparing apples to oranges. But it does frustrate me a little. This is why its been a tough answer when people as me the ever popular question “What are you doing when your lease is up?”
My answer: I have no stinken idea.
Now, I giggle nervously at myself for that answer. For one, Im a planner. My friend challenged me with a question of just taking off without packing for a trip, could I do it? The thought made my uncomfortable. Not because Im a control freak, but I need some form of familiarity. So for me not know what Im doing in less 3 months, yeah its kinda scary, but I know it will work out. (Its only a big deal if you make it a big deal, right?) Id have to say, with that being my response, Im single in every sense of the word! (“But if you say its worth is all I’ll take the first bus back.” ~Tara Leigh Cobble) I have no responsibilities that tie me down that I should have more of an idea than I do what Im doing this summer.
Im happy both here in Alabama and in California. I left a very happy life in California. I had a lot of good things going for me. The thing I miss the most would be the friends, my family and the ministry I was apart of. As much as I love my Alabama friends and church, that cant replace my group in California. And vise a versa. So thats hard. I miss them, but if I left, Id miss my friends here dearly (Im getting sad just thinking of the idea). Im used to being away from people in California now. They have moved on with their lives without me (I know how dare they ). I feel more apart of things here, because Im here, it hits closer to home. I made that choice when I uprooted and started to replant some seeds here last August. But that doesn’t mean its not tough to have to maybe make it again.
I really don’t know where God wants me when it comes down to it. I don’t want to be out of God’s will, thats even more scary than waiting on an answer from Him. I must admit though, I have not been faithful in seeking His counsel on this matter. I think mainly because it stirs up a lot of emotions I just flat out don’t want to deal with. I know thats very selfish, shows once again, Im a sinner. (As Im well aware) But what I do know, is that He is above my sin. He is the King of my life (even if I may not act like it every day) and is bigger than all of it. Time wont be my master because the King is not dead and great plans for me. Hes been faithful all 22 years of my life thus far!
I may sound not responsible to some, but I try not to make my focus pleasing others. I do like to please people, but when it comes to how I should be living my life, thats between God and I. I highly respect people close to me in my life thoughts and advice. I drink it in actually, hoping they’d make big decisions for me. Thats why this one is a tough cookie. I cant lose ether way. Heck, maybe God has a totally different idea than my plans A and B. I want to be open to what He has for me. Sometimes that sounds like just throwing caution to the wind, but being in His will has to be one of the most freeing feelings in the world. So, I long for that, to know Im in His will.
Carla and I both wore a spring dress to church this morning. You’d think this would be normal to wear a dress for church, but not at the Vineyard . We wear jeans on Sunday, which I personally think is awesome since I don’t wear jeans 5 other days of the week when Im working. My pastor even had a tie on, which I was even surprised at. Along with a lot of people dressed nicer than normal, my church made a video to make fun of the Easter bunny. It involved my friend Ross scampering around downtown Tuscaloosa in a bunny suit and scampering the way to the woods with a hunter pointing a gun at him. They cased each other around for a while, then the Easter bunny hands the hunter an egg from his basket and they became friends. Sounds nice right? End it right there, right? Noooooo not my church. The final shot is of a living room thats full of animal heads and the final head we see, is the bunny’s! I hope no 5 year olds was in that room and saw that, otherwise, I thought it was pretty dang funny.
Jon taught out of John and read the Easter story out of Mark. (We even had a sheep and a goat for part of the sermon. The sheep wanted to talk for Jon of the time. Carla was sad she didn’t get to pet it.) But the way he told the story of Jesus saving us, becoming our leader, he brought us back to the bridegroom part of the Lord. This morning in church I felt like I was at wedding. I don’t mean to get cheesy and say that Jesus is my husband (actually that’s more “Jesus is my boyfriend” that I think is cheesy) but I really feel back in love with the Lord this morning. Jon told us to think of our dress just waiting for us to put on and walk down the isle to Him. To follow Him for the rest of our days. The closing song was Paul Oakley’s “It’s All About You” which fit perfectly in my mind for the wedding in my heart.
My friend Jordan invited me and Ashley over to his family’s house for Easter supper. His family just didn’t think it was okay for us girls to not have good food on Easter away from our families. I guess lately I had forgotten or gotten used to that I lived in the south, but this afternoon I was very aware. His family is full of thick southern accents. His aunts are very southern, grade A gossip queens. The food, which of course included fried chicken and sweet tea (very very very yummy food too. Ashley and I stuffed ourselves and then they brought us desert plates!). We then went over to the other side of his family house where we were told “yall come back now”. I love southern hospitality!
(For this part of the blog entry, please click on the links as you read the post, for full effect. Thank you.)
As some of you know, we have a bird named Peaches who has made her nest in a tree right outside our front porch. About a week and half ago we discovered she had three eggs in her nest! We waited for the eggs to hatch, and yesterday when I walked outside the door to go to work I saw them ! I called Carla outside to see the babies! They were just too cute with their little beaks sticking out waiting to be fed! So dependent on their mommy! Their names are Strawberry, Blueberry and Raspberry . One of them doesn’t pop up all the time when they hear us coming, which is sorta disconcering. We didn’t see him at all the day they were hatched, so he might be a bit slower than the other two . Im excited to have this happening right next to our porch. Im going to be sad when they learn how to fly!
I really should not read other people’s blogs before I actually blog for the day. Its kind of like listening to Phil Keaggy then sitting down to try and play guitar.
I picked up a new book today, “Flabbergasted” by Ray Blackston. (Also, for Kari anyone else whos a book nerd like myself, I have made a spot over to the left side, of the books Im reading and will try to keep that updated) Ive seen the book many of times before but for some reason never picked it up. Its bright green, you’d think I’d at least give it a second look, but no. We got a shipment of this book in today because apparently Ray Blackston wrote another one. I forget the title, but it goes after Flabbergasted, so Im reading this one first (makes sense, right?). I picked it up because two pages into this book the guy is going to church merely for the sake of meeting single women. Now, thats one in a million that Christian novel starts out like that, don’t ya think? I found the writing funny as well. Maybe this will hold me over till “Shes Out of Control” comes out this summer.
Leaving work this evening it was very warm outside which I thought was kinda odd. Im going to stop listening to my Alabama friends because every time its warm, they think, no big deal. Theres been thunder and lighting all evening. The national weather service had to interrupted my rerun of Friends to tell me we have a server thunder storm warning. No kidding. The weather always fascinates me so I listen to what Mr. Weatherman had to say (plus, Im waiting for Friends to return) which is this might turn into a tornado, so they are going to keep a close eye on it for us. And I was just driving home thinking I could live through the two tornado storms I have and be just fine, but no, theres a chance I’ll add one more to my list, lovely.
Ive officially have this scab on the rim of my nose from blowing it so dang often this weekend from my cold. Its not cute and no there will be no pictures, sorry to disappoint. When I walked into work Tuesday morning with my roll of TP under my arm Neda (the office manager) asks “Are we out and no one has told me?” I laugh and tell her that I haven’t left my house since Saturday night to get tissue and this is all I had. I put my purse away in my locker, grab my name tag and walk towards the sales floor. Neda hands me a box of tissue, aloe touch the box says. I thank her for the box and take it with me up to the front registers where Im assigned for the day. I pull a tissue of the box and it was a world of difference. Bless Neda for giving me such a wonderfully soft tissue for my nose. But I learned the hard way with this scab that my nose deserves better.
Last note, due to lack of shelter, Carla and I will only be spending the day in Nashville instead of the weekend which is a bummer. But, I just happened to check out Sara Groves website and guess whos in Bham this Saturday night?! *alisa does happy dance*