We survived wedding weekend! Here’s what went down.
~ ONE ~
Thursday morning I packed up way more clothes than I could possibly wear in three days, rented a sweet Focus and headed out into the spitting rain down I-40 to Greensboro, NC. It was time for Alisa‘s wedding and I did not want to be late. And by not late, I mean not by more than my usual half hour or so.
(Sidenote: I bought leggings last week. I wore them on my drive with a long plaid button down and I was so self-conscious every time I stopped that I almost dug into my suitcase for some jeans. My efforts to be cool are so futile.)
I pulled into my hotel with its hallway full of food smells just in time to turn around and run back out for the girls’ dinner and lingerie shower. I love a good lingerie shower… it’s one of the only places a youth pastor can get away with inappropriate comments and I try take full advantage. We made wine charms and told funny wedding stories and ate amaretto cupcakes. It was super fun.
~ TWO ~
Friday morning I got up and went to the nail salon to discuss yellow nails and R. Kelly themed wedding receptions. Got a manicure just in time to be an hour late picking Scott up from the airport and have the phrase “WATCH THIS HAPPEN” enter my life. We drove around for a thousand hours, made thirty-seven illegal u-turns and finally made it to the non-rehearsal dinner with the Hollands, Trey and Andrea. I had the most delicious chocolate chess pie there has ever been and visited Eugene Street, but I can’t tell you what happened there.
~ THREE ~
Wedding day! Susan and I got up, got dressed and got ourselves over to Kari‘s house to help the girls get ready and ohh and ahh over mustard heels and leopard wedges. Then we drove to the church to ohh and ahh over flower girl dresses and leaf necklaces and work on our Beyonce dance moves before heading out for a quick lunch. And that’s where it all went wrong.
If I could take back one moment of the weekend, it would be this one. I have the most adorable pair of grey round toe stacked heels in the world that I had never worn. I’d put on my sensible flats in the morning, but thought I would put on my fancy shoes before lunch. BIG MISTAKE. Everyone always says you get what you pay for with cheap shoes. But what they don’t tell you is what those cheap shoes are made of – plastic and SHARP ROCKS. We ate lunch and headed back to the church where I was to begin my guestbook duty. By the time all the guests were seated and I made my way into the church I had lost all feeling in my toes.
The wedding was beautiful, of course, and Alisa and the girls looked fantastic. I cried where I always do at weddings, when the dad gives the bride away and during the vows. It ended, we got up and I limped and winced my way to the reception which was full of photo booths and crossword puzzles and seriously delicious apple pie. We had a great time, she tossed the bouquet, we blew bubbles at them as they made their way to the ice cream (!) covered car. I have never been so happy in all my life as I was when I finally pulled those sensible flats out of the trunk of my car and slipped them onto my feet.
~ FOUR ~
After the party is the after party! (R. Kelly! What up!) These are the things you need to know about the after party: there was beer. There was delicious pizza. There were ex-girlfriend stories and Iranian boss stories and moldable plastic frames. There was a trip to the Sprint store (that was almost VERY embarrassing for me) and Target (who hates me) that included a “Conquest” singalong that made me laugh until I cried. There was moonshine and football and a big white fan.
~ FIVE ~
After the after party is the after after party! Everyone cleared out and four of us sat around and talked until FOUR IN THE MORNING. Four! You guys! I have not seen four a.m. from that side in a thousand years. But it was fun and cathartic and enlightening and I didn’t need that sleep anyway. Even though when we left it was so cold outside I wanted to cry frozen tears.
~ SIX ~
Biscuits the size of your face.
~ SEVEN ~
I drove to Greensboro alone, but I got to ride most of the way back with Susan. Susan is awesome because she knows all the words to “Lovefool” and “We Danced Anyway” and she will unwrap your Dilly Bar for you on the windy roads and she knows what you mean when you talk about how much you love Jack’s Mannequin. We talked about old boyfriends and inappropriate crushes and whether or not it is a good move to put someone you know in real life on your list.
It was a great weekend.