Month Three. February 9, 2012
As I write this, you are asleep in the swing in front of me. This is what we call a MIRACLE. Month three has been the Month of No Daytime Sleeping. At all. Ever. Not even in the car seat.
The tradeoff is that you’ve been sleeping at night for several hours. Eight, even, that one time, and the next morning I ran a marathon backwards while singing showtunes. It’s almost worth it, the way you’re letting me sleep for more than two hours at a time. You don’t want me to put you down during the day, but at least I’m fairly rested while it’s happening.
Month three is also the Month You Found Your Voice. And oh, what a sweet voice it is. You are just bubbling over with sounds – coos and laughs and squeals and ahhs. We just sit and watch you talk. I could do it all day. Some of my favorite moments are when you’re hanging out with your dad, just talking away, and he’s asking you follow-up questions.
Aaron: Really? Then what happened?
Aaron: No. You’re kidding. How did you feel about that?
You: buh buh buh
Aaron: What do you think we should have for dinner?
You’ve really become an alert little person lately. You can hold your head up and steady, and you want to look around all the time. We’ve had strangely warm weather the past few weeks, so you and I have been taking walks around the neighborhood, you strapped to my chest and facing out at the world. Your eyes are wide and your mouth is open and I talk up a storm, trying to tell you about trees and colors and dogs and neighbors and sunshine. This is your world, girl. I want you to know it.
You love to ‘stand up’, pushing off on your feet while we hold you up. Your dad is convinced you’ll be walking any day now. We bought a bouncy thing that hangs from a doorway and allows you to sit up with your feet grazing the floor. One day you’ll use it to push off and jump and swing around. Today you use it to drool on.
I’m learning more and more how to work and be your mom. We have two awesome friends, Cristy and Becky, who take care of you a few days a week so I can go to meetings and sit at my computer for more than five seconds (see: no day sleeping). They are fantastic and I am so thankful for them and how much they seem to enjoy you. And you them.
Month three was a tough one for me. Lots of personal crisis stuff – what am I doing, is this still the right job, should I work at all, can we afford it. Ultimately, the question is this: What do I want my life to look like? I’m still working that out, sister. But I’m trying. We’re trying. And we’ll get there.
I love you, sweet cheeks. Thanks for being awesome.