the day i gave advice to a high schooler
By david On August 17th, 2007so last friday father maple (my band) played at wild river country (a water park) for a citywide youth group-type event of some sort. of course i was super excited about playing in the water and on the slides for free. and so there i was, feeling pretty confident because, well, i was one of the attending rockstars, which always feels great. i was waiting in line for one of the slides and there was a high school kid next to me. a little ways down the line was a group of high school girls who, upon seeing this guy, all waved and did that high school girl thing. now i’m pretty sure this guy was not one of the recognized awesome cool guys at school. he was a little overweight, pretty reserved…all that kind of thing, but still a cool guy. our conversation was as follows:
david: dude, that’s awesome, girls never waved to me like that in high school.
chris (the kid): yeah, well, it’s nothing special…they always do that when they see me.
david: but still, they’re waving at you and being glad to see you…would you rather them not?
chris: i don’t know…
david: maybe it’d be more special if they gave you a hug or a kiss or something…
chris: yeah, especially the one in the black…
david: (high five) alright, man, you need to start talking to her!
chris: yeah, i asked her if she wanted to hang out sometime, and she said sure, but i didn’t say when…
david: (interrupting) DUDE! you have to tell her when!
chris: well, the next time i did…i said, do you want to do something on tuesday. she couldn’t, but she told me to ask her again the next day, but when i did, she said she was sick, so i haven’t asked her since then…
(at this point he is kind of dejected)
david: ok, dude, listen…she told you to ask her again, not to get away from her. you have to keep after her. ask her again…she wants to know that you care enough. you have to pay attention to all her little hints…she’s not going to come right out and tell you she likes you, that’s not how they roll. you’re going to regret it if you don’t get a definitive answer from her…you just have to be confident.
chris: yeah, that makes sense.
david: in fact, my band is about to play…go ask her to dance, she’ll love that.
chris: maybe…
david: ok dude, good luck…wwhhhheeeeee!! (because at that point it was my turn to slide down the slide)
anyway…i thought it was hilarious that i offered any kind of girl advice/encouragement to him, because i was totally the shy reserved guy until about two months ago. and that’s that story.
![[caedmonscall.net]](http://rmfo-blogs.com/images/ccneticon.jpg "The official unofficial fan site of Caedmon’s Call.")
![[derekwebb.net]](http://rmfo-blogs.com/images/dwneticon.jpg "The official fan site of Derek Webb.")
![[rmfo-blogs.com]](http://rmfo-blogs.com/images/rmfoblog.png "About the [rmfo-blogs.com] service.")
Joe James Says: August 24th, 2007 at 2:35 pm
Go Dave! There’s one for the high-schoolers who lack confidence. What about the ones like me, who had way too much confidence, and really no reason to have it?
Regardless, your post makes me want to listen to that old 80’s song “Let’s Hear It for the Boys!”
Val Says: August 27th, 2007 at 11:13 pm
Yay, that’s a cute conversation. And it’s totally true. As is the “Nice Guy Paradox” post from before…
My old roommie and I called it “edge”. Where you knew the other person would be bad, but they chose not to be. And had such conviction about it that you trusted them and rightly so.
Between that and being specific and pointed, I think as long as the girl thinks there’s any chance it’ll work out, she’ll be swept into the fun of having a guy who knows what he wants. (It’s such a relief. “Do you like ice cream? I’ve been wanting ice cream for DAYS now and I was thinking that if you had time tomorrow afternoon, I’d like to get some with you.”
)