the dreaming tree

silly love song

Ξ January 7th, 2008 | → 1 Comments | ∇ poems |

i never said it would be easy,
but i never thought it’d be so hard,
cause day after day
i’m still here wonderin’ why
things change and hearts break.

i never liked to take chances,
but i’d wish upon a star;
even in the moon’s shadow,
my dreams make me believe
in something more.

c’mon baby, now, let’s dance
and wish upon a star:
we want dreams worth living,
and a love everlasting

so let’s go for a drive,
far away to another place,
where all i’ve ever wanted to say
is wide awake in your eyes.

poem2123

Ξ November 8th, 2007 | → 0 Comments | ∇ poems |

the breath on my neck is not hers
but i wish it was
i can’t say her name
but still it lingers
and my mind wanders back
into traces of old feelings
where her face is faded
and nearly unfamiliar
ghosts of belonging
swirl like a mist
across the water

memoriam

Ξ June 14th, 2007 | → 0 Comments | ∇ poems |

i have some memories
and i’m not too sure
that i want to share them
with anyone but you
but lately i’ve been lonely
and they just slip out
oh, i wish i could get them back

do you remember the time…
it doesn’t matter which one
just remember one
and i’ll meet you there

what do i call something that’s just like all the others?

Ξ April 27th, 2007 | → 0 Comments | ∇ life, love and the pursuit of God, poems |

i wrote this poem in 10th grade–10 years ago–but it still feels pretty apt to what i experience in my life everyday, so i’m posting it again, rather than rambling on about the things i hate and how i’m sick and tired of life. i’m tired of letting people down. letting my God down. i want to be folded into safety, but that’s not coming for a long time, and i’m impatient. so impatient.

the stinging desert wind,
steadily rising as if urged on
by an higher authority:
biting, it is hurting me–
can i trust it, or will
i be abandoned?

like the blanket too short
for my bed, the truth never
entirely covers my contorted
body, convulsing in an attempt
to realize its message, screaming,
sweating, it won’t find me

can i become? what?
help me, i must succeed…
when i was younger, though
still i am, wandering, searching;
help me. allow the fall to be
cushioned by the softness of your
Power.

it’s just a poem (only words)

Ξ October 10th, 2006 | → 0 Comments | ∇ poems |

does she ever think of me
when she’s with him?
i don’t know
i’ll never know
does she ever lie awake
wondering what might have been?
i do
i always do
i’m lonesome in her memory
sinking like a stone
hoping this’ll be the last time
and hoping it won’t
i can still feel her soul
pressed against mine
and what i know of love
is ever fixed by her name

writing poems is easier than naming them

Ξ May 9th, 2006 | → 2 Comments | ∇ poems |

i never said it would be easy,
but i never thought it’d be so hard,
cause day after day
i’m still here wonderin’ why
things change and hearts break.
where’s the cure?
cause who needs that anyway?

c’mon baby, now, let’s dance
and wish upon a star:
wish for dreams worth livin’,
and a love everlastin’.

i never liked to take chances,
but i’d wish upon a star;
and even in the moon’s shadow,
my dreams make me believe
in something more.

so let’s go for a drive,
far away to another place
where all i’ve ever wanted to say
is wide awake in your eyes.

for those times she won’t talk

Ξ April 26th, 2006 | → 0 Comments | ∇ poems |

you can’t smile tonight
but it’s alright
lay your head on my shoulder
and we’ll wait for the sunshine
together
i’ll wipe away the tears
one at a time
i swear i don’t mind
just let me be here

words, words, words

Ξ April 9th, 2006 | → 0 Comments | ∇ poems |

here’s some more words i’ve been moving around in my head because of something that won’t leave my head. i hope you don’t hate it. it’s not finished (as is the case with most of what i write), so feedback is greatly appreciated.

i fell down the spiral staircase
but romance was gone
and you ran…
left me here, heart in my hands
full of bleeding memories

so i wrap you in a clever charade
vainly devoted to an empty notion
and pretend everything’s just fine
when the sun is rising in the evening

cause i still dare to miss you

hiding beneath shattered walls
in dreams you left behind
the truth doesn’t comfort me at night

though it’s over
you’ll always linger
and give rise to a shiver
full of yearning
for a new day

changes

Ξ April 2nd, 2006 | → 0 Comments | ∇ poems |

here’s a poem/future song:

hey babe,
i saw you again last night
still sneaking around my dreams;
i thought i invited you to leave,
but i guess i can’t let go.
though the dance is over
the steps are still familiar:
just yesterday i loved you
(it’s been forever, baby),
but my heart is surrounded,
siphoned by a broken dream
of what will never be.
leave me alone, babe,
and i’ll move on this time.
before you go, tell me the truth:
will i ever forget you?

have i posted this?

Ξ November 23rd, 2005 | → 0 Comments | ∇ life, love and the pursuit of God, poems |

i wish i could grow up again. not necessarily so i could change the way things are, but simply to experience things from new and different perspectives. maybe i’d live in california this time around. maybe i go to private schools. maybe i never play baseball. how would my personality and self change as a result of just a few differences? today at wal-mart i saw a mother showing her son a butterfly perched on a flower, and i sat there and watched the boy seeing with young eyes, eyes that haven’t seen the world for what it is. he was filled with awe and wonder, and he passed it to me, even for such a simple thing. i loved the place it took me–wondering about my own experiences and early explorations of life and the palette i drew from. and then i thought, hallelujah…there is so much more to learn, to see, to grasp, to ponder, to touch…to be.

i am
           a brok 
                   ,de)from(es   ne

fa
   ll
     ing                  and(my tree)
                 nwod 
                          (wounded)
             down               
                          do
                              wn    
 into what               softly
i               perc(bleeding)eive
             as
;evol                             

        and       i       am
                                            (enraptured(anew)

hm

Ξ August 1st, 2005 | → 0 Comments | ∇ life, love and the pursuit of God, poems |

well, i was going to post something about how self-absorbed i am…but that’s the only thing i could think to say about the matter, and i’m not sure what that means. here’s a poem:

In the desert
I saw a creature, naked, bestial,
Who, squatting upon the ground,
Held his heart in his hands,
And ate of it.
I said: “Is it good, friend?”
“It is bitter - bitter,” he answered;
“But I like it
Because it is bitter,
And because it is my heart.”

-stephen crane (1871-1900)

another untitled

Ξ July 21st, 2005 | → 3 Comments | ∇ poems |

hey girl
i just kissed you goodbye
for the first time,
i hope it’s not without a next…
and here i am drivin’ away:
a little more than nervous,
but this time it’s ok.

and i’ve been listenin’ all night
to any love song i can find,
but nothin’ comes quite close
to sayin’ what my heart is screamin’,
so i guess it’s up to me
and my cliché words:

without you
i’m not the same
when i’m with you
i’m not the same
and to hold you in my arms
is like nothin could ever gonna bring me down

c’mon now, baby, let’s dance
till the night has come and gone;
and we’ll wish upon neverending stars
while dreams too deep for idle words
surround the shape of our hearts

and when dawn breaks
i won’t run away, i swear
cause i see that with you
i’m finally me

poem, band pictures

Ξ July 14th, 2005 | → 0 Comments | ∇ poems, rockstar |

i’m sorry to say
i no longer believe
the in-between lies
that made it seem so real:
what was stolen away
will become my lost cause;
the way you taught me to cry
fake tears, i shudder to think
anything could mean less
than the unrequited love
hiding in your feel-good
presentations of sincerity.

i love my band. we’re good. and getting better. so come see us play in our hour of growth. then you can say you saw father maple before…well, before we broke up, at least. but that could be in 9 years, so you probably have time. anyway, we’re playing @ the soundstage in conway on friday the 15th of july with bear flag revolt. your face will be on the floor.

news and a poem

Ξ July 7th, 2005 | → 1 Comments | ∇ could be anything, life, love and the pursuit of God, poems |

exciting news: i joined an ultimate league in fayetteville! yes, it deserves an exclamation mark. now i will not be without ultimate for the rest of the summer as i had feared. they also play pick-up on thursdays, and after my first day of playing on tuesday, it seems that there are more great players than there are in little rock, so hopefully that’ll stretch my game and i’ll get better. and the other news is that, for the very first time, i own a cell phone. yes, it’s true…so, who wants to call me?

and now a poem…

maybe there are bright lights up ahead,
but right now it’s so dark that
even the lighthouse is glowing dead,
and my heart makes its home within.

suddenly i see a sign:
it’s flashing red, insistent,
and i know i’ve got to get away,
but it’s so comfortable here.

so i hang on to my illusion,
resolved to stay
cause what’s the worse that could happen?
who’s that calling my name?

run away, run away
the bright lights shout:
their luminant voices
hurt my eyes and sting my mouth

i’m fighting the truth,
and though i know i’m not right,
the battle rages on,
screaming through the night;

at last the darkness defeated flees
and i can no longer resist,
so i crumble into the flame:
my thirst quenched.

(untitled)

Ξ July 3rd, 2005 | → 1 Comments | ∇ poems |

i am
           a brok 
                   ,de)from(es   ne

fa
   ll
     ing                  and(my tree)
                 nwod 
                          (wounded)
             down               
                          do
                              wn    
 into what               softly
i               perc(bleeding)eive
             as
;evol                             

        and       i       am
                                            (enraptured(anew)