Life As an Afterschool Special

*edited to fix grammer*

On Friday I went out with some friends after work.
I started drinking at 5:15. I was in bed by 10:15.
They call them Zombies for a reason.
And even if you are at casual cocktail Friday and other people are buying, consuming more than one Zombie an hour is NOT a good idea.
Also, calling everyone you know after you have drunk them may or may not be the wisest idea ever.
(But YAY for me that I didn’t call a single ex!)
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On Saturday I enjoyed a chick day.
I went to the mall (where I got a freaking EIGHTY dollar gift certificate for trying on jeans at old navy and telling them what I thought. I got PAID TO SHOP. Hello died and gone to heaven)
Then I met Kim and Kathy for lunch.
Then Kathy and I went and got pedicures.
There is nothing like a pedicure to make you feel beautiful and girlie and pampered.
And after our pedicures we went and bought new open toes high heels.
My toes are SO cute. Seriously. If I had a camera I would take a picture. They are pink with a white flower hand painted on them and they look SO cute in my new white shoes.
Why is usually Asian ladies who work at nail places?
Seriously. Have you ever wondered that?
After our pedicures watched a movie and then met Ann for pancakes for dinner.
They were the worst pancakes EVER.
I didn’t even know pancakes could be bad.
But they were the most vile tasteless pancakes ever made in the history of the Americas.
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On Sunday I got up early and went to the gym and ran on the treadmill.
I love the feeling when you are sweaty and have pushed your body hard. It makes you feel alive and strong and beautiful. After I ran I went tanning, and then caught the light rail to the mall.
Why do men hit on woman on the bus and light rail? What is about me that says… “Man I would love to date someone who takes public transportation”
And why do men hit on you when you have just ran on the treadmill for an hour and sweated like a pig and haven’t showered and now you are stinky and have no makeup on and wearing yoga pants and a yoga jacket.
Because if you hit on me when I look/smell like that I won’t date you just because you have bad taste.
Seriously. Have some standards.
I went to the mall and then met Sally for lunch at subway.
Then I came home and showered and took Susie out for Tai food for mother’s day.
While we were at the restaurant Rebecca called and said her boyfriend had broken up with her.
So we finished dinner, went and bought some chocolate, and headed over for post traumatic breakup duty.
*This is where I rant*
Can someone PLEASE explain to me why Christian men with a good heads on their shoulders become idiots when it comes to relationships?
And someone explain to me why they think “its not you, it’s me” or “I just have this FEELING” or “God said” is EVER a good breakup line?
I don’t understand how a man can say “I am attracted to you, we have the same goals, we have the same vision, and you are one of my best friends” but I just FEEL like we shouldn’t be together.
Stupid “god card”
It makes no sense.
Don’t you think, as Christians, we super spiritualize things?
And maybe it’s just because I didn’t grow up “in the church” but I honestly don’t get how everything can be right and yet they “feel” something is wrong and that’s what they go with.
Didn’t they “feel” like everything was sunshiny last week?
It makes me cranky.
It makes me crazy.
*End rant*
We told a story about Susie’s daughter. Who is amazing and beautiful and articulate and inquisitive? Sometimes too articulate and inquisitive. While shopping at the grocery store Susie and her daughter ran into a woman with a beard and a mustache. The daughter turned to her mom and said “Is that a woman or a man? It looks like a lady, but she has hair on her face” My friend didn’t answer so she asked again louder. “Is that a lady with a beard?”
Hee. We may be single… but at least we arent hairy.
(And we have GREAT toes)
So we hung out and had girl talk and cried a little and laughed a lot and prayed together…
I called a friend on the way home, which made me smile and laugh and stay up way later than I wanted. But it was worth it.
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So that is my weekend. Full of girliness and drama. It was perfect. And completely exhausting