Life As an Afterschool Special

At what point do you become so brilliant and good at what you do that nothing else, including your fans, matters? I have been thinking that a lot today as I try to process the Ryan Adams concert from last night. I saw Ryan Adams play at the State Theater in Minneapolis.

To start with, let me say Ryan Adams really is brilliant. His music is amazing. His lyrics are beautiful. His voice is stirring and soothing all at the same time. I admit I was not at all disappointed with what he sounded like live, if anything, he was more amazing live than on cd. He really is that good.

Last night I fell in love with his music all over again. I wanted to wrap it around me and cocoon myself in it. I called my friend Scott, who had introduced me to Ryan Adams, during the show and said that Ryan Adams music made me want to make out. And truthfully, it did. His music is sensual and sexy and passionate and brought out passion in me.

With all that said, I am not sure I would pay to see him again. His music speaks for itself, I think it would be hard for anyone to say something awful about the music last night. Dear John was amazing. Two was amazing. Everything he did was amazing.

What wasn’t amazing was his attitude. He complained about the sound system. He never interacted with the crowd except to yell at people who were yelling and clapping. He said we sounded like Cavemen and he couldnt hear us anyways. Then he played one more song and walked off the stage after just a hour of playtime. I was crushed. I waited for him to return and the lights came on.

The concert was over just an hour after it began.

I didnt understand. I called my friend Scott to tell him about it and he said Ryan is somewhat known for his temperamental behavior. He has a hard time on tour. Today I checked out the Ryan Adams forum to see what others were saying. Basically everyone said the same thing. Music is great, concert was short, Ryan Adams does what he wants.

I guess the age old question would be why a musician creates music in the first place. I gather that Ryan Adams is one of those musicians who creates music because he has to, because its in his heart and soul and it eats away at him if he doesn’t. His music is for him, and we are lucky enough that he lets us in to listen at all. But at the same time, in researching today I have read and heard his reactions to negative reviews from his shows. He clearly is passionate about what he does. And he wants people to appreciate it.

So where is the line? How volatile can you be and still keep your fans? How can you except people to appreciate you when you clearly dont appreciate them?

I am not sure. Because while I do appreciate Ryan Adams music, and I fully admit everything he played last night was amazing, I am not sure I would pay to see another show. In theory, Ryan Adams makes thousands of dollars to play music. But I am girl on budget. I am all for a good show and a night out… but I do not have the money to spend on a show where the musician may or may not decide he feels like playing.

The thing is a good show takes two. It takes fans who are willing to spend money, give up time, deal with traffic and people, understand that the sound might not be perfect, and want to stay anyways. Because the music matters. It also takes a musician who is willing to put himself out there, even if everything is not perfect.

It takes two.