A public service announcement regarding peppers from Mike and Kari.
KARI: At work today, they said my eye looked better.
MIKE: Really?
KARI: Yeah, you don’t think so? It’s a little red, but that’s because of my cold.
MIKE: Oh, the redness is better. It’s just more purple underneath.
KARI: My makeup has worn off.
MIKE: It looks like I hit you.
KARI: That’s what I tell people.
MIKE: Well, I made the stuffed pablano peppers for dinner, and the sauce will help open your sinuses.
KARI: Great! Let me taste!
MIKE: Just get a little. It’s really spicy.
KARI: *tastes* Wow! That’s good. It’s really spicy!
MIKE: I know. I’m surprised at how spicy it is.
KARI: But the rice will cool it off.
MIKE: There’s a lot, too. This is supposed to be for four peppers.
Later, while eating dinner.
KARI: This tastes really good. But . . . I like spicy things. I don’t know how you’re eating it.
MIKE: It’s not that spicy.
KARI: Right. *gets more water*
More time has passed.
KARI: So, on the recipe, did it say it was going to be this spicy? Did it have lots of flames or chili peppers next to it or something?
MIKE: No.
KARI: I didn’t know that chipotles were this spicy. Can I look at the recipe?
MIKE: Yeah, it’s in the book over there.
KARI: It doesn’t say it’s this spicy. That’s so weird.
MIKE: *gets refill*
KARI: Will you bring me a tortilla or something so I can cool my mouth off?
MIKE: That’s a good idea.
KARI: I’m just surprised . . . hey, Mike?
MIKE: Yeah.
KARI: How many chipotles did you use?
MIKE: How many does the recipe call for?
KARI: One canned chipotle in adobo sauce.
MIKE: One canned?
KARI: Yes.
MIKE: Not one can?
KARI: Oh, my.
MIKE: …
KARI: How many did you use?
MIKE: *gets can out of trash, laughs uncontrollably*
KARI: HOW MANY DID YOU USE?
MIKE: 18.
KARI: *cackles*
MIKE: I didn’t actually read the recipe. I just used the stuff I bought.
KARI: Well, this has been a very informative meal.
MIKE: There’s a big difference between one can of peppers and one canned pepper.
KARI: My whole mouth is burning.
MIKE: But are your sinuses open?
KARI: My sinuses will never close again.
MIKE: We’re going to have to pour it out.
KARI: I would like to disagree with you, but . . . I’m dying.
MIKE: Farewell, spicy sauce.
KARI: We can use salsa on the rest of the peppers.
MIKE: I really like chipotle flavor.
KARI: It’s kind of hard to tell the flavor when your taste buds are being scalded.
MIKE: Don’t touch your eyes. Now my mouth and my eye are burning.
KARI: This was a dangerous dinner.
MIKE: You’re going to write this up, aren’t you?
KARI: I think people need to know. For safety.
MIKE: Read the recipe. Learn the difference between “can” and “canned.”
KARI: Your mouth will thank you.
May 19th, 2006 at
I suppose now’s as good a time as any to confess that I have a mancrush on Mike.
May 19th, 2006 at
That must be a common mistake because Cooking Light just changed the way they include the canned chipotles in recipes after getting complaints from readers who used the whole can.
May 19th, 2006 at
Now I know why Kari couldn’t reply to any of my emails after the dinner hour … she was too busy SOAKING HER HEAD IN ICE.
May 20th, 2006 at
Okay so when I come over for dinner can I request Kari to cook?
May 20th, 2006 at
I am SO GLAD I am bringing lunch tomorrow. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
May 20th, 2006 at
Awwww, don’t insult Mike’s cooking. He worked hard to make me dinner last night. He just made a (very painful) mistake.
May 20th, 2006 at
I realized this morning that I left out the part where we were trying to figure out how to salvage the sauce and we realized that we needed to add 68 more tomatoes to balance out the 18 chipotle peppers. That’s when we decided to throw it out. Good times.
May 20th, 2006 at
(love Mike and Kari conversations!)
May 20th, 2006 at
how are you supposed to separate ONE pepper out of a can of peppers? that seems wasteful. that must have been like eating fire though.
May 20th, 2006 at
That’s actually a good question, Scott. I can definitely see where the mistake was made. Besides, it’s Mike … it’s not like he really wants to eat fire. [And buddy, I'm right there with you, even if it causes Kari to call us "wussies" again. ;)]
May 20th, 2006 at
dang. i love spicy food…but that makes my mouth hurt just thinking about it.
in college, one of my roommates ate a whole can of chipotle peppers on a dare. he couldn’t feel anything in his mouth for over a week.
May 20th, 2006 at
This reminds me of a story from Jeff’s fraternity.
Their meal plan consisted of rotating cooking duty among the brothers, but the kitchen manager would always come up with the recipes they were supposed to use.
One night, they were supposed to be having fettucine alfredo. The recipe called for three CLOVES of garlic.
Yep, they used three HEADS of garlic.
It was inedible. And I like garlic.
May 21st, 2006 at
You two are funny. I laughed out loud.
May 29th, 2006 at
My favorite part was: “My sinuses will never close again.”
LOL.