Through a Glass, Darkly

One of the ways that I know I am very Southern is that, aside from going to workout and going to have my wisdom teeth removed, the last time I can remember leaving my house without eye makeup is when I was a sophomore in college. And that was unintentional - it was when I was living with my aunt and uncle, and they were out of town, and I overslept and had to feed the cats and forgot my engagement ring as well as finishing my eye makeup. That was also the last time I forgot my engagement ring, because I saw a girl I knew, who asked where it was, and when I said I had forgotten it, she said, in a reproving tone, “I never take mine off, so I couldn’t possibly forget it.” Well, I take mine off every night, but the rebuke worked, because I haven’t forgotten to put it on since.

Back to the makeup - what I am saying is that the last time I intentionally left my house without eye makeup was . . . before I started wearing makeup. So, around high school. I don’t think I wear a lot of eye makeup, but I do wear some, and I wear it regularly. And it makes me look better, which makes me feel better about myself. Up until two weeks ago, the last time I intentionally left my house without eye makeup and while wearing glasses was probably middle school. (I’ve been wearing contacts since I was 10.)

The week before my surgery, I had to wear my glasses. No big deal. I mean, I didn’t love it, but it was pretty much the last time I’d have to wear glasses in public, so I could deal. But the last few days before my surgery, I was not supposed to wear eye makeup. That was a slightly bigger deal, since I was wearing the glasses, too. I was unhappy about it, but I tried to suck it up and hoped that no one noticed, since my glasses make my eyes look so small anyway.

After my surgery, I was told to “use my common sense” about resuming everyday things. This morning I finally decided I could shower without using my eye patch (no pirate jokes), but I still haven’t put on any eye makeup. It does make getting ready in the morning a little faster, I have to say. And I don’t think I look terrible (it would be worse in the winter, I think, but it’s not so bad to look fresh-faced in the spring), but it appears that others do. So far this week I have been asked if my eyes are weak (nope, just not wearing eye makeup), told that I look washed out (probably because I’m not wearing eye makeup), and asked if I was especially tired (actually, I slept fine, but you should know that I’m not wearing eye makeup).

I am definitely a makeup kind of girl, but I secretly enjoyed not wearing any, if only because I survived it and I didn’t look horrible (at least not to most people). I’m still going to wear makeup regularly, if only because it makes me feel good to do myself up, but it wasn’t so bad after all. This weekend, though, marks the return of mascara, eyeliner, and eye shadow. We’re going to see Scott and Kelly, and I don’t want Kelly’s friends thinking I am weak-eyed, washed out, or tired. I want to look like myself again.