Laden with Thoughts

Worship.

Josh and I are both involved in the worship ministry at our church, The First Congregational Church of Hopkinton. On our worship team, Josh plays the bass guitar and I am the lead female vocalist. Our team leads the congregation in worship once a month for both Sunday morning services.

Music has always been one of my greatest passions. I am so thankful God chose to give me some talent in the singing department, and I don’t consider it a coincidence that singing makes me more happy than most other things in my life. When I close my eyes and sing to God I find myself transported to a little world where only He and I exist. Singing is also an effective way of focusing my mind during devotions or prayer when I find my mind is wandering. There’s some kind of power involved with singing (and music in general) that I can’t explain.

After a service where my team has led worship, I inevitably have a few people come up to me and tell me how much they enjoyed the worship music that morning, or how a certain song encouraged them in some way. It’s so wonderful to hear how God changes people through my service to Him, so I look forward to getting that type of feedback. I’m sure that sometimes there are people who didn’t particularly enjoy the worship music that morning, but usually I don’t have them come up and say that to my face. (And that’s just fine with me!)

One piece of encouragement I often hear which challenges me each time I hear it is: You did such a wonderful job this morning. I could totally see the love of Jesus in your face.

Wow.

That floors me. What a precious gift God has given me! And what a burden. Sometimes I think these people see me as some kind of sweet, pure, young woman with an incredible relationship with Christ, whereas I see myself as an immature, impure, young girl with a struggling relationship with Christ. Obviously, they don’t know me apart from what they see of me on Sunday mornings. But the question remains in my mind: if these people saw me during the week, would they see the love of Jesus in my face?

Lord, let me be more like the woman these people see: a young woman with the love of Jesus shining through her.

5 Comments so far

  1. Geof F. Morris February 22nd, 2004 7:34 pm

    I find it a shame that I have not heard you sing, Kathleen.

  2. Meghan February 23rd, 2004 4:04 pm

    I feel the same way a lot of times….sometimes I think that people mostly just see the top layer of politeness, and I feel that if they got to know me better, they wouldn’t think that I was all that great.
    It’s good to know there’s somebody out there who feels the same way :)

  3. April February 23rd, 2004 4:59 pm

    Wow. I totally know where you are coming from on this one. I play my flute every Sunday in my 2,000 + sized church and inevitably someone will comment about how I blessed them. It’s amazing, because some days I don’t feel like I could have blessed anyone, be it because I felt more nervous than usual, or I didn’t play very well, or I just was in a rotten mood, but the Lord always takes me and molds me and continues to use me regardless. I mean, I totally know that He’s in control when that happens! And that’s cool.

  4. Mom February 23rd, 2004 5:33 pm

    That joy you have in singing worship music in confirmation (if you need it) that your singing is not merely a natural talent, but a spiritual gift. As are the encouraging comments from others. Thanks for using your gift to build up the Body of Christ!

  5. Mark "sage" T March 14th, 2004 10:06 pm

    Has your team made any recordings?

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