Laden with Thoughts

So many things have changed in life since I last used this blog. I got pregnant (thanks, Josh!), I quit my job, I had a baby (hi, Liam!), Jason Harrod came to our house TWICE (*wink* to dawn!), I went back to my job part-time, and now I suddenly find myself with a 7 month old little boy grinning at me daily and spitting pureed garden vegetables onto my only nice pair of work trousers.

Life is awesome.

And yet, questions I had expected I would have answered by now still remain unanswered. Some even remain unasked. What is my true place in this world? Am I only called to be a SAHM to my son and any future children I may have? Or is there something beyond family that I should be focusing on, planning for, thinking about? Friends of ours just left to serve on the mission field in Bethlehem, Israel. They know what God has called them to. They seem secure in their plans, plans they feel God has laid out for them. It’s not that I think I am called to be a missionary, but I do feel as if being a mother is simply not enough for me. Raising a family to trust in the Lord is a huge responsibility and an enormous task all by itself, and it’s certainly a task I am so happy to work at until it is completed… but is that the only task assigned to me?

I pray and feel no peace, and no answers.

But at least I have a sturdy little man who happily comes with me to the post-office, the convenient store, and of course, the dry cleaner’s. I really hope pureed veggies come out of wool.