Rhonda's Ramblings

I started working at the Northridge about 10 months ago. And for about the first 3 or 4 months, everyone that I worked with thought I pretty much had no personality and no concept of fun. I think there are a couple reasons for this. First, because I’m kind of shy and my fun side comes out after I know people better. Second, because I am a Christian, my concept of fun is kind of different than theirs, and I don’t participate in a lot of things they do, (smoking pot, getting drunk…..).

Carlos is my manager and was one of those guys that had no interest in even knowing me. Tonight was our last night working together.

Neither of us ever thought we would be friends. We are so opposite and different than each other. He has four kids, is 39 and single, loves to drink a lot, works 7 days a week in pursuit of the almighty dollar, is not a Christian, speaks English with a strong El Salvadorian accent, loves to bet on sports, and kind of perverted, but has a great sense of humor, is very generous, a hard worker, a good father, and very loyal.

Somewhere along the way, though, he became more than just some guy I work with. So much so, that he got tears in his eyes and gave me a kiss on the cheek when we said goodbye tonight. Not in a way that seemed weird, like it would have a couple of months ago…just in a way that seemed really sweet. And I was surprised to discover that I will miss him. He’s a good friend.

I do not even come close to realizing the enormity of my sin. And, to be honest, I don’t often feel deep conviction for my sin. I was taught from a young age that Jesus died for my sins, and I’ve pretty much been a good girl. I’m not “that bad”of a person. I sin, but Jesus’ blood covers it. And I know that if I sin, His grace is sufficient. These are not conscious thoughts that I have as I sin. But when I step back and reflect on my attitude towards sin, I see this pattern of thought.

This is very dangerous thinking. It cheapens the grace that Christ paid a huge price to extend to me. It’s basically saying “I know that sin is wrong, but I will be forgiven, so I’m gonna do it anyway.” Deitrich Bonhoeffer would call this “cheap grace”.

Cheap grace is the deadly enemy of our Church. We are fighting today for costly grace.

Cheap grace means grace sold on the market like cheapjack’s wares. The sacraments, the forgiveness of sin, and the consolations of religion are thrown away at cut prices. Grace is represented as the Church’s inexhaustible treasury, from which she showers blessings with generous hands, without asking questions or fixing limits. Grace without price; grace without cost!

Cheap grace is the preaching of forgiveness without requiring repentance, baptism without church discipline, Communion without confession, absolution without personal confession. Cheap grace is grace without discipleship, grace without the Cross, grace without Jesus Christ, living and incarnate.

Costly grace is the treasure hidden in the field; for the sake of it a man will gladly go and sell all that he has. It is the pearl of great price to buy which the merchant will sell all his goods;

Costly grace is the Gospel which must be sought again and again, the gift which must be asked for, the door at which a man must knock.

Such grace is costly because it calls us to follow, and it is grace because it calls us to follow Jesus Christ. It is costly because it costs a man his life, and it is grace because it gives a man the only true life. It is costly because it condemns sin, and grace because it justifies the sinner.

Above all, it is costly because it costs God the life of His Son: “ye were bought at a price; and what has cost God much cannot be cheap for us. Above all, it is grace because God did not reckon His Son too dear a price to pay for our life, but delivered Him up for us. Costly grace is the Incarnation of God.

Costly grace is the sanctuary of God; it has to be protected from the world, and not thrown to the dogs;

;Dietrich Bonhoeffer (February 4, 1906-April 9, 1945)

Oh, how I pray that I would have an understanding of the gravity of my sin. And how I wish that I didn’t treat the grace of God with such nonchalance.

The word Spring is a perfumed word. It means youth, love, song, and all that is beautiful in life. ~Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

The wind blows softly, filled with the scent of freshly mowed grass. As I sit on the porch swing lost in the world of a book, the squeaky chains that hold me up provide background music. The many birds that are scavenging for food in the front yard add their songs. I look up from my book for a moment to greet the family from next door as they walk to church. I take a break from my book and remain in the swing to enjoy the sights and sounds of spring and daydreaming. Something about this time of year always makes me want to fall in love.

After I finish the book, I wander to the backyard to pick some flowers….iris, daffodils, calendulas and a few remaining blossoms from the fruit trees. Only 2 days ago, the fruit trees in the backyard were covered with snow white blossoms. Today, the blossoms are gone, replaced with fresh green leaves, and the promise of fruit in a couple of months. As I picked flowers, I discovered new daffodils blooming, and the cutest, smallest daffodils I have ever seen. If you know me at all, you know that this thrilled me.

Knowing that I needed to accomplish something today, besides enjoying the amazing beauty of God’s creation, I reluctantly went inside and did some housework: dishes, Laundry (which I hung out on the line), packing for Africa, and other chores.

Add to this a call from my mom, making brownies, a visit from my brother, and picking oranges in the backyard….it has been an amazing day. I am now cooking some dinner, and if only I would receive a phone call from a certain guy, my day would reach perfection.

Being involved in missions so much, I have written my share of support letters asking for financial and prayer support. But it doesn’t get easier. I still feel uncomfortable doing it. And for my Africa trip, I had decided not to send one, since I used frequent flier miles for my flight. But since, the root canal incident, I decided to send a letter. I don’t know why they make me so uncomfortable. That’s how missionaries earn their salaries…through support. But I’m not a full-time missionary, so I feel like people will be thinking that I’m just asking for money to go on a vacation or something. But God has always been faithful in providing, sometimes as a result of a support letter. This is the horrible plea for money I sent out today.

I never know how to start these letters. I feel like you are just reading it, dreading the point at the end where I tell you that I need financial support. So to save the suspense, and get the dread out of the way, I will tell you now that the plea for funds is coming. But first….

Exciting news! No, I’m not getting married. I am going to Kenya, which is exciting to me. After two years of living with my grandpa, (which I’m so thankful I have been able to do), he has moved into an assisted living home, and I am wondering what is next I do have a bit of vision for the immediate future.

I am going with an organization called HEART (Health Education for Africa Resource Team), and with my friend, Vanessa Reed, who some of you know. www.africaheart.com

I will be involved in different aspects of the outreach in which HEART participates. One of the main objectives on this trip is for the organization to continue to build and maintain relationships with people of influence in Kenya. . HEART has recently acquired a facility that needs to be equipped and arranged to accommodate the many teams that will be coming in the next few months. Many other projects are also in the works. Health and AIDS education seminars are one of HEART’s main focuses. They are also working on a project to ship crates of medical supplies that have been donated. Vanessa is doing research for a book on FGM (Female Genital Mutilation).

There is lots going on with HEART, and I’m not sure exactly what I will be doing. I kind of jumped into this blindly. But, isn’t that how most mission trips are? Even when you think you know what you will be doing, you end up being surprised?

So, I would like to ask for your prayers that God would use me in whichever way he sees fit. I leave in two weeks, and I have had some large unexpected dental expenses come up, which I thought would keep from going to Kenya. But I have decided to take a step of faith, trusting that God has a plan and will provide. So, I also could use prayer for finances.

I really do appreciate your prayers and hope this letter finds you all well. I’d love to hear from you.

If you would like to help support me financially, there are a couple of options. If you would like to make a tax-deductible donation, checks can be made out to HEART with my name not written anywhere on the check. If you don’t need it to be tax-deductible, they can be made out to Rhonda Hutchinson. If you would like to pay by PayPal, let me know, and we can arrange that.

They can be sent to:
Rhonda Hutchinson
PO Box 1362
Colfax, CA 95713

Oh, and I will be in Europe from June 1st to June 16th, and would love to see some of you guys.

I went to the dentist yesterday for my 6 month check-up. Not my favorite thing to do. But yesterday was worse than usual. I found out that I have an abcess in my gum and have to get a root canal. Normally, this would suck. But at this point, it more than sucks.

First of all, I am supposed to leave for Africa in 2 weeks. And the crown usually takes longer than that to be fitted by the lab.

Second of all, it costs a buttload of money….money that I do not have. I cannot afford to get a root canal and go to Africa. But I don’t want to be stuck in Africa with “pain worse than childbirth”, as my dentist described how much it can hurt if it doesn’t get fixed. And I don’t want to have to end up getting a root canal while I’m in Kenya.

So….I don’t know. I spent a while crying about this yesterday. I really want to go to Kenya, but I also really want to have teeth when I am 40. And I feel like at this point I have to choose between a root canal and Kenya, unless God provides for both, which he can do. But how much does that choice suck?

I think I’m doing great and trusting God, but then things like this happen, and I have a hard time trusting. Why must I make these choices? I guess if I was a good Calvinist, I would realize that I don’t really have a choice, so there would be no need to worry.

I’m rambling.

Waitresses and waiters are people. You are not better than me because you have more money or a “better” job than I do. I like to be treated with respect, just like you do. Just because someone is waiting tables does not mean they aren’t smart or educated. There are many reasons that educated people may be waiting tables.

Treating me in a such a condescending manner just tells me that you are not confident in who you are, and have to belittle others to make yourself feel better Please don’t make yourself try to feel more important than you really are by treating those who are serving you with disdain.

Remember….these people who you treat like crap are serving your food. And sometimes when they are treated poorly…they might treat you the same way.

P.S. 10% is not a good tip.

I will have a crush on Mark H. for the rest of my life. There is no question about it. I’ve had a crush on this guy for over 5 years, and there is not much hope of getting over it.

Thankfully, he now lives an 8 hour drive away…so I don’t see him very often. Only when I am visiting my sister at school…or when he is visiting his family in my area. But I did see him yesterday…and he was as cute and funny as ever. He gave me his business card, with his new job title which he was excited about: Fitness Center Manager. One of the many reasons that it will be a one-sided crush for eternity. He manages a fitness center at a college. I’m definitely not a fitness girl.

And it’s pretty obvious after 5 years that he has no interest in me whatsoever. But that’s ok. I will still get twitterpated when I see him, and be my cute, fun, annoying self. And since he is 32 and single, he will get desperate pretty soon…and there I’ll be, still having a crush on him.