Valancy

Valancy wakened early, in the lifeless, hopeless hour just preceding dawn. She had not slept very well. One does not sleep well, sometimes, when one is twenty-nine on the morrow, and unmarried, in a community and connection where the unmarried are simply those who have failed to get a man.

Deerwood and the Stirlings had long since relegated Valancy to hopeless old maidenhood. But Valancy herself had never quite relinquished a certain pitiful, shamed, little hope that Romance would come her way yet–never, until this wet, horrible morning, when she wakened to the fact that she was twenty-nine and unsought by any man.

Ay, there lay the sting. Valancy did not mind so much being an old maid. After all, she thought, being an old maid couldn’t possibly be as dreadful as being married to an Uncle Wellington or an Uncle Benjamin, or even an Uncle Herbert. What hurt her was that she had never had a chance to be anything but an old maid. No man had ever desired her.

It’s sad that I relate to those lines so much. I don’t always mind so much that I am single. I am independent and have the freedom to do a lot of things that I never would have been able to had I been married. And I enjoy my singleness oftentimes. But it does hurt to know that I have never had a chance to get rid of that singleness. No man has ever desired me. I could write paragraphs about this, but that would get a little too personal, probably, so I will refrain.

The excerpt is from my favorite L.M. Montgomery book, The Blue Castle. I have read the Anne of Green Gables series and the Emily books, and I love them all. But I very much identify with Valancy at this point in my life…though I identified with Anne and Emily at other points.

I first read The Blue Castle a few years back when I was visiting my dear friend, Avril, and her sister in Rochester, New York. My favorite British boy, Andy, was also visiting. On a beautiful autumn day, we decided to spend a day by the water. We spent the day at a park on Lake Ontario…and for entertainment, we brought a soccer ball, The Blue Castle, and each other. Much to Andy’s disappointment, I am sure, we decided to read this book out loud. And Andy got sucked into reading it with us as well. And he even agreed to read a chapter out loud. It might have helped that we were in a very adolescent mood…so, we read this book as a “romance novel”. It’s amazing how many old-fashioned words can be twisted.

I don’t own this book, but I decided to order it tonight. So, I will have it in a couple of days. The entire text is available online. But somehow that is not nearly the same as turning pages in a book.

So, maybe I will do a better review once I read it again.

At 29, Valancy had never been in love, and it seemed romance had completely passed her by. Her only consolations were the “forbidden” books and her daydreams of the Blue Castle. Then, Valancy suddenly took charge of her life and discovered a world full of surprises and adventures.