What to Play

Someone on a forum brought up buying a kitchen playset for his son, and asked for thoughts. Most people said it would be fine, but I said I wouldn’t buy one for my son. Someone asked why, and this is what I said…

Because I would rather have my (hypothetical) boys playing outside, doing something adventurous than playing in the kitchen.

Not that I think it unacceptable for a man to cook or be a chef… no, I think that would be very cool, actually.

But I think that what and how our children play shapes how they think about the world. I want my boys (should I be blessed with any) to be conquerors and warriors.. I want them to have a thirst and ambition for dominion. And I think giving them swords and dragons and castle playsets will shape them more in that direction that a kitchen playset.

What do you think?
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edit: a few more of my posts in that thread. I think you can basically guess what type of comments I was replying to.

I want [my girls] to be home despots.

I want them to be good wives and mothers, primarily. I want them to be able to manage a home well. Of course, this is taking dominion. I want them to have a thirst and ambition for dominion just as much as any boys I may have… but their focus will be different.

A man’s focus, I believe, should be outward, to the world. And a woman’s should be towards the home, and towards her husband.

I wrote this a while back… might give some insight.

Hey, where did I say cooking is inherently feminine? Or that a kitchen set is intrinsicly feminine?

Oh, that’s right. I didn’t….

I just said that playing ‘cooking’ and playing ‘slay the giants’ will affect a child’s orientation to the world differently. And I’d rather my son have the ‘slay the giants’ orientation than the ‘cooking’ one.

Even if he grows up to be a chef.

I do believe that to be world-facing is masculine and home-facing is feminine.

However… that isn’t the same thing as saying kitchen sets are intrinsically feminine. I believe they are generally made for girls, and I believe that playing with them will lead to a more feminine outlook on the world when contrasted with, say, a castle playset. But that doesn’t say they’re intrinsically feminine, or that castle playsets are intrinsically masculine.