Bringing the Drama

so my trip to chicago may be postponed or cancelled altogether. which isn’t really that bad. i’m going to DC for a conference the week before i was supposed to go to chicago, and if i don’t go when i thought i was (aug 24th), i’ll be able to see lifehouse at the HOB. speaking of the HOB, the schmay and his trio are playing there in late september, and i actually have people to go with. here’s to new concert friends!

the shuttle launch the other day was interesting. it was pretty tense, i’ve never been so nervous and excited for something at the same time in my life. glad to read how the astronauts are doing well, etc. i won’t be comforted until they land in a couple of weeks. however, it sure was cool to watch it launch tuesday.

so i bought this new hard drive on friday. the plan was to take my old computer, take out the old HD and install the new one. yeah, that didn’t work that well. i tried to network the old computer with my router, which didn’t work. and working with the old computer, i realized how slow it was. wow. how did i ever survive 5 years of college with it? crazy. anyway, i pulled all the old comp files off (i have video files on my current comp bigger than the entire old comp’s HD) and then formatted it. i don’t know what i’m going to do with my old comp yet. when you actually want to recycle or properly dispose of something like that, its awful difficult to find a place close by. anyway, so i took the new HD and just put it in my current computer. i felt pretty proud of myself, never actually worked with the insides of a computer that extensively before. oddly enough, i was on the phone with my computer genius friend scott while i was in the process of moving the hard drives. he pretty much just provided moral support. cool.

there are a few things i know that are true in life. one of these things is that if you are dating someone who happens to be chosen for real world or road rules, you might as well call it off before they leave. 99 times out of 100 there’s an episode of the show where one of the people is saying “its just so hard with a long distance relationship” but what they’re really saying is “all these hot people around, i can’t help myself from a little ‘comparison shopping’”. just do yourself the favor and be the breaker and not the person listening on the phone as the guy/girl gives you some sob story, then next thing you know on the show they’re telling the camera you’re not good enough anymore. its a scam!

last night we had a party for andy’s leaving. i’m really going to miss him. the last time my best friend (i use the term loosely, i don’t really have a ‘best’ friend) moved away was 10th grade when my friend kris moved to cincinnati. it sucked, but i moved on. i was in high school, its all a blur to look back on. andy leaving though really hurts more than i thought it would. when i think back on when i first met him after i had moved back here, and the different things we did together, i’m going to miss all of those times. he’s probably influenced me more than anyone else has the last two years. the fluorescent light in my garage, buying a house, getting a grill, not buying new bedroom furniture, buying an air pump, ‘the absorber‘, potato wedges from walmart, even some of my vocabulary and how i say things. i guess i hadn’t really thought of any of that until now, but dang that’s a long list, huh? and i’m not even that impressionable! the next time i see him will be in september when i go see coldplay. it’ll be a long two months that’s for sure. just getting used to not having andy at work, a different carpool feel…it’ll be different.

so anyway, back to last night, we ate, we drank, we talked, shared stories, shared information about digital thermostats, gutters, wood flooring. what most twentysomethings talk about on a saturday night. we played DDR (4 player!). chad got some short films of us playing, then thomas set up the two xboxs and eight of us played halo. good times.

i’ve become interested in these group blog things, and am in talks with carpool team members to start one of our own. don’t worry, personal blogs would not be neglected, but i think it’d be fun to do. i don’t know whether or not it would actually happen since two members have never blogged and the third is still kind of transitioning to even having a blog. so we’ll see..

(this took some encouragement to get posted)

this entry has two stories…if you want fun first, skip to the 2nd one first….

i do stupid things sometimes. saturday night was definitely one of them, and i will make every effort that it will be my last such instance. i thought about how writing about this would make me look, but as a fan of derek webb, we should be so bold as to share our sins on the 10 o’clock news. anyway, saturday was obviously laurin’s wedding. it was great, although it started off with us getting lost going to the church because google maps was wrong. imagine that? so we get to the reception. and in typical louisiana summer weather, its humid AND hot. i have a weakness. i drink whatever it is i have in my hand way to fast. it doesn’t matter what it is. i can’t really chill with a cup of coffee, cause i drink it too fast. so here we have hot and humid weather, me in a suit burning up, and free alcohol. i’m sure by now you can see where this is going. nothing bad happened, i didn’t puke all over my own car (which my friend len drove home) or anything, but i definitely drank way more than i’m used to, way more than i should have, and way more than i ever will again. add in the fact that i tried to be cool and order some vodka drink that i’m not used to drinking, but i’m not going to blame anyone or anything but myself. i never want to do that again. i tried rationalizing it and saying people have crazy nights in college, but i never had those. i rarely get drunk, i usually just like to go out and have a couple of beers with friends and hang out. however, none of that made me feel any better today. fortunately i had gone to the wedding with good friends who took care of me. nothing major, but i never like having to be a burden to anyone for anything. not that i’m too proud, but i don’t like to put anyone out if i don’t have to. anyway, i don’t plan on ever doing that again. it was really a moment of clarity type thing yesterday. so i wanted to blog about it since i like to look back on things in my life, and i definitely do not want to forget about this moment anytime soon. its a learning experience, and instead of trying to hide anything, i’m just putting it out there. so there’s me being open.

however, while i’m being open and honest, here’s a story i’ve been remiss to share the past couple of weeks. you may remember the drama created by a past blog post causing a friend of LGID to come forth with anonymous comments. but i felt that its high time to tell this story since i’ve had friends sort of request it. so LGID and i go to the keane show at the saenger. we get there early, grab a swank parking spot for cheap, and have time to waste. she suggests we go down canal to the starbucks in one of the hotels. so i figure “okay, i can do that.” we exit the parking garage and begin walking, i have the parking ticket in my hand, and i reach to grab my wallet so i can keep track of the parking ticket and BAM!, she grabs my hand to hold it. for those that know me, they know i don’t do PDA at all. i don’t kiss in public and i sure get uncomfortable holding hands in public. but instead of explaining all of this to LGID, i just roll with it. “it can’t be so bad, can it?” i think after the initial “uh oh! i just wanted my wallet!” thought. we walk maybe 5 or 6 city blocks with this hand holding, and its just really bothering me, to the point where i actually said “you know, i’m not really the hand holding kind of guy”, to which LGID replies “oh, well, we don’t have to if you don’t want to”. fellas, you know that doesn’t mean “we can stop”, so in the spirit of giving the lady what she wants, i say “no, its okay, i’m fine.” we hold hands until we end up having to cross the street to starbucks and thus ends the hand holding odyssey. and all of it caused because i wanted to put a parking ticket stub in my wallet.

hey, how’s that for a smoldering mimbo title? haha.

so today at work was pretty cool. len came back officially today, but that combined with andy’s impending departure left things a little bittersweet. not even the email i got indicating my acceptance into the leadership program at work really made a dent. i’m excited about that, up next a week long conference in DC. my friend melanie and i are already planning to make it to an orioles game while we’re up there. so looks like i’ll be staying here till at least march, then from there i’m not sure. its a rotation type thing, so i can rotate to a different company lcoation, which could be cool.

i did not post about the eisley show. it was awesome! we met their parents before the show at the merch table, and talked to their dad for about an hour. so that was super cool, and we didn’t even talk about the band much at all. mostly about the music business, relevant, ’scene’ kids, etc. hopefully jacob can get a phone interview later on down the road. the show was great. i tried typing a review, but its pretty tough. i can’t really put into words why i like their songs. i definitely think the highlight for me was ‘marvelous things‘, which is a song i’m not really into on the album, but live it just took on another life. a couple of unreleased songs they did were really good too. the opening bands didn’t really grab me. after hearing so many things about lovedrug, i was left feeling underwhelmed. the first opener, pilotdrift, were hardcore indie. they actually announced “we’re out of actual cds, so all we have left is some cd-r’s in cardboard sleeves that you’re more than welcome to buy.” haha, i thought that was pretty cool.

so yeah, today mostly consisted of trying to come up with a song for laurin’s wedding party to dance to this weekend. any suggestions? i’d appreciate them.

last week definitely had things going on that were nice and not so nice. my friend andy is actually moving. he told me on friday when we were at his house. i had suspected this a couple of months ago, and for it to be happening is quite odd. i don’t know that it has hit me yet. i was able to hang out with him a couple of nights this weekend and in honor of the impending hurricane, made hurricanes. they came out pretty good, much better than the time my friend ryan and i tried to make them with the powder mix. anyway, friday night andy and i grilled out, and i told him as we sat down to eat “this is what i’ll miss”. its been three years since i’ve moved home and andy’s become a real good friend in that time. groomsmen level even. i couldn’t help but think that the times andy and i have grilled out with just us or a group have been memorable. they’re all like one of those beer commercials, i forget the brand, where you’re sitting there saying “it doesn’t get any better than this.” i guess the silver lining on all of this is that he is going to houston, so i might stay there when we go see coldplay. i must say though, when he started off with “i have some news” on friday, i was hoping it was going to be “i bought a ring”. but i guess moving for the girl is a big statement too. hopefully before he moves, i’ll get him to help me install a florescent light in my garage. i’ve been meaning to do that.

this weekend i went to my friend thomas’ wedding. a couple of weeks ago, he had a party at his house with a few people from work and his soon to be cousin in law, who also happened to be a girl i graduated HS with who i had not seen since graduation, literally. combine this with the fact that the last time i went there he and the fiancee had already known the LGID (last girl i dated), i remember telling him “everytime i come over here thomas it just gets weirder and weirder.” so among other people i saw at the wedding including the two bosses from work, was the girl from hs as well as the usual suspects from work, i’ll call us the YA (young alliance). how much longer the YA will stay together is really tough to say. andy’s leaving, and i’m waiting to hear about that leadership program, but even if i get in it, i don’t know if i want to stay. however finding out how much the program grabbed attention for andy’s resume, i might hang around and see it through. i must admit i’m getting that ‘wheels spinning’ feeling and i’m kind of feeling left behind too (not with work really, just the people around me in the YA), so i think it’d be nice if something massive happened.

with all the hurricane stuff the past week, first the sleepless night tuesday with the tropical storm then the anxiousness of this weekend’s hurricane, i’m not sure how much more of this ‘being targeted by a wonder of nature’ i can take. at least i didn’t have to evacuate this time.

and i’ll close with saying i’m glad i found a bible study i really enjoy. i saw a guy in walmart the other night from the old bible study that i left and we didn’t talk 5 minutes. in those five minutes, he told me i should come check out the old bible study because of how its been revamped and ‘cool’. after he left i kind of went “that seems so fake”. it was like he was trying to sell me something instead of being a friend. i’m so glad i left that group.

so i caught a gecko in my breakfast room tonight before i ate dinner. that really has nothing to do with what i’m going to type, but i found it interesting. anyway, i went and saw ‘war of the worlds‘ with my buddy ryan today. it was very good i thought, and tom cruise was fine. although at one point i couldn’t help but think of all the ‘acting crazy’ he’s doing and all the headlines he’s been making. it was only during one scene, the rest of it i kept thinking about how creepy tim robbins was, or how cool the movie was.

one scene did grab my attention, and made me mad. i don’t like being angered or frustrated by movies. i don’t like arlington road for this reason. one scene in the movie today angered me. i’ll preface it by saying again how i’m reading blue like jazz. one of the first chapters is about how we as humans have a sin nature. in other words, the smart money is on that we would do the wrong thing if given the choice most of the time. we’d normally do bad things if we knew we would not be held accountable for it. he makes an analogy about how you drive the speed limit when there’s a cop around, but when there’s not one, you speed. at least i do. you have to train a child to behave, they are not born with the mindset of obeying their parents or anything. see what i’m saying? so back to the movie today…there is one scene where mob violence occurs. i’m talking people jumping on top of the van cruise and his kids are driving and punching out windows while they’re in the car, people physically pulling them out of the car. i was angered by this…is this what i should expect people to do in the case of a catastrophe? they actually carjacked the van and then a few minutes later, a guy opened the door and shot the driver who carjacked cruise. shouldn’t i expect people to have common sense? i have a cynical way of looking at people i don’t know. i know i probably shouldn’t, but i’m not one of those people who assumes people are going to do the right thing. i see people blatently disregard others and it angers me. and seeing the carjacking scene in the movie just really got on my nerves. if aliens invaded earth, are people just going to go around shooting each other over caravans? really? if so that is terrible. i don’t understand how people can do that to each other. i want to believe that in a crisis, we’d all band together. i have reason to believe this, we all were all friends in the days following sept 11th. so i guess i can chalk up the carjacking to movies, but i wish they could have left that part out.

all this went along ironically with a new commercial for the one campaign. i was watching some of the live 8 shows today and saw it. its very powerful. am i to believe humanity cares about each other that something like the one campaign can be successful? i saw a documentary movie of the tibetan freedom festival one time a few years ago. most of it was filmed during the first concert. i remember they showed the entrance gate and one guy came in yelling “FREE TIBET!”, but in that ‘i’m drunk and i’m at a rock show, YEAH!’ way. i couldn’t help but think that person really had no idea what the tibetan freedom festival was all about. i thought of that type of person today watching live 8. do the people in the crowd really understand how big of an undertaking ‘making poverty history’ is? my cynical attitude towards humanity lends me to believe no, they don’t. most of them are just there for the music. i really think the one campaign is a good thing. i think the wide array of people involved leads me to believe it will work. i notice they have wrist bands, and my first thought is ‘hey, that’s been done‘, but i give them credit for trying. getting a daily reminder out there is tough, and a bracelet brings up conversations.

anyway, i’ll wrap up this meandering entry by saying i want to believe society has good in it. i want to think people will treat each other decently when faced with crisis. i guess i just need to see more people treating each other with respect on days when there are not giant metal alien controlled tripods roaming the earth.