Sharpe's little blog

**Update: Here’s a link to the sermon referenced in this post. Take a listen, then download the whole series from iTunes.***

I’ve been thinking for a while that I ought to do a post of all the different sermon podcasts that I subscribe to on a weekly basis, with a little explanation of what I like about them. That may be coming in the near future, but this post isn’t it. For now, I’ll just say that one name that will be near the top of that list is Matt Chandler from the Village Church outside of Dallas, Texas. The man is a great preacher. He makes sarcastic references about “bringing the sexy back.” He’s preaching slowly through Ecclesiastes. I like this guy a lot.

A few weeks ago, he made reference to the idea of Karma. As the great one-hit wonder the New Radicals said, we only get what we give. The prevailing philosophy of the world, just under the surface, is the idea that if you receive blessings or sufferings, it traces back to something good or bad that you did. We hear this same idea in the church all too often, in a slightly sanctified version. People are blessed because of their obedience, or punished to purge out some hidden sin in their lives. And none of that is true. Chandler called it “Love’s great interruption.” It was love that said that there’s more going on here than some cosmic balancing act.

For some weird reason, I got to thinking about Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego in Daniel 3. If you grew up in the church, you know the story like a nursery rhyme. If you didn’t, it’d probably sound like one of the most bizarre little tales ever told. The basics is that these 3 oddly-named young men refused to bow down to and worship a statue of their king. The king then sentenced them to be thrown into his big furnace to be burned for such insolence. They experienced the unfairness of the world, as they for simply obeying the First Commandment. They were doing the right thing, after all. Yet when they were thrown into the furnace, they were not burned. Instead, they got to hang out with Jesus a few thousand years before He would be incarnated.

I wouldn’t mind it if it always worked that way. The injustice of the world is brought against these faithful young men, yet it can’t touch them. They never really suffered in the flames. They were blessed for their faithfulness. And I honestly don’t get it, because the fires that I feel seem real enough right now.

I wonder if Karma is just another grab at artificial control. When life doesn’t make sense, the easiest thing often seems to be to set up everything in some big spreadsheet of credits and debits and use that to explain your current reality. It doesn’t even matter if it’s true or not, only if it makes you feel a little better for a little while – if this constructed story makes sense for just a few minutes.

I’ve been thinking in regards to some hard things going on in the lives of some of my friends right now. In some cases, there are bad decisions that have painful consequences both direct and indirect. In others, there just isn’t that. And I think in both cases its a mistake to try to use that kind of a flawed evaluation.

In John 9, a blind man is brought before Jesus. It surprises me that His disciples ask Him, “who sinned that this man was born blind?” It would have made sense if the Pharisees or the crowd asked Jesus this. I guess I figured the disciples should have known better. Jesus answers the question in a strange way. He doesn’t acknowledge anyone’s sin, but says “this happened so that the work of God might be displayed in his life.” And then Jesus heals the man.

It takes a lot of faith to say that there is more going on in all these sufferings than we can see right now. It’s much easier to just beat yourself up and make yourself the tragic, heroic victim of Karma. Yet God doesn’t work that way. Don’t you believe it for a second. Love is a great interruption to the apparent ways of the world.

Well, I promised some YouTube videos from a few weeks ago. Here they are, in their amazing, hilarious glory.

Still Haven’t Found What I’m Looking For:

Wonderwall:

I’ll Be: (with Seth going CRAZY)

This weekend was awesome as my old roommate Adam was back in town, and we got to cram much hanging out and catching up into a very few hours. It’s funny how quickly your brain will make that little switch that makes it feel like no time has passed at all and we’re back to life as it was. Then the plane takes off and you’re where you really are. Heidigger and I are making friends lately — Drew would be proud.

If those last few sentences didn’t make any sense, don’t worry. It’s not you; it’s me.

I found this linked on another blog and thought it was amazing.

In other news, my friend Josh Bales recently released his new CD. I haven’t heard it yet (beyond the stuff on his MySpace), but he’s been really excited about it everytime I’ve talked to him. I plan on picking one up from him when he’s in town next week. Josh is one of the few artsits that really grabs my heart and makes me want to be more honest with God and believe the Gospel more readily. It’s great stuff.

First, someone linked to this blog looking for “how the stock market works.” That is good humor folks. People thinking that I learned enough in Macro Econ 101 to actually be able to explain how the stock market works. I’m amazed that I got through a discussion of economics without getting all uppity about the way that capitalism depends on depravity in order to function. Anyway, it made me laugh.

A couple of weeks ago, I got to talking with some of the other guys in the counseling program about our college experiences. All of us in the conversation were involved in some kind of campus ministry, and we were left with very mixed feelings about the experience. Let me say up front, I’m hugely thankful for my experience with my campus ministry. I have a great group of friends that were willing to accept me and love me when I was a tough(er) person to love. I grew in my faith and knowledge of the Word. I even started to attend my first Presbyterian church and heard about such things as depravity and election for the first time in my Freshman year small group. Many of the other guys had positive experiences as well, getting their first tastes of spiritual leadership through the campus ministry. A few of the guys had even stayed around after college to work on staff for a couple of years before coming to attend seminary.

But there was also an odd common thread that ran through our stories that was a little darker. One of the guys captured it best with a simple question: “Did any of you have that guy in your campus ministry?” He went on to describe what he meant, and we all quickly found ourselves nodding in familiar acknowledgement. Somehow, the campus ministry guy (CMG) is always the same. He’s an archetype, really.

** He has a quiet time every morning.
** He disciples 3 guys, all of whom are awesome, and he leads a small group.
** He’s athletic, works out sometimes, plays sports – but never takes them seriously.
** He has a great sense of humor, and people always smile when they spend time with him.
** He is a very good student, but doesn’t take pride in his grades, and can always take time out to talk.
** He can play most any worship song on guitar, and the David Crowder Band is his favorite group.
** He is always respectful towards women, but can joke around with them too.
** He’s a John Piper nut, and quotes him regularly.
** He’s at every campus ministry function, often talking to the people on the outskirts.
** He spends many Friday and Saturday nights giving rides home to drunk freshmen, yet he’s always in church on Sunday.
** He is up front every week in large group, with a funny story and a great insight from the Word.

And everybody likes him.

It makes me uneasy when I look at that list. I’m really surprised at just how do-able all these things are. I can have a quiet time every morning. I can work out. I can read John Piper. I can learn guitar. Not that any of those things are bad. These are all good things. But I realize how often I think I’d rather be like the CMG than be like Jesus.

Actually, I realize how many of these things I have been doing, following the example of good ol’ CMG. I realize the reason why I did so many of these things, because I wanted to fit in and I wanted to be recognized. It’s only recently that I’ve begun to realize how so many of these things are just another way to hide. In my quest to get what CMG had, I grabbed for recognition by adopting all of his activities, hoping that somehow all of these behaviors would add up to a person that people would accept.

By the grace of God, I think that I’ve outgrown many of these things. That might mean that I’ve just found new archetypes to cling to, but I hope not. And I still think a lot about going into campus ministry after seminary, so I worry about the dangers of CMG. I’m scared that many campus ministries do a great job of talking about grace, but then they end up encouraging students towards a subtle works-based righteousness through the easy-to-emulate CMG. And it’s a lie. It’s a gaping hole.

The conversation was a while ago, but I kinda wish I could revisit it. I wonder if the other guys I was talking with ever felt like they were able to become the CMG – to be THE guy. I wonder if it was fulfilling. Maybe it did feel like the top of the world — for all of a year and a half. Or maybe it felt like you were always faking it, trying to fill a role that everyone expected of you. I dunno, I never really was all that good at it. I know that trying made me arrogant, tired, and detached. And grace is slowly letting those old wounds heal.

It’s been a good couple of days. Yesterday I got to sample gator at the famous (or not-so-famous) Black Hammock with Paul. Neither of us had experienced the Hammock before, and found it sadly devoid of bikers. It’s only about 10 minutes away from campus, and yet it feels like you’re in the complete boondocks. It’s a cultural experience, they say. Our lunch was accumpanied by a great assortment of old Southern Rock hits over the radio, while throwing in some Nickel Creek as well. It was a also a great chance to compare notes with Paul on worship leading, counseling, and life in general. I miss getting to play music with him each week, but I’m glad our friendship is continuing. We also ran into Jeff and Eva, who were also having their first experience of the big bad BH. My personal take: fried gator is actually very good, and well water isn’t all that bad, but I can see why some people hate it.

Last night Seth organized a big party with the UPC college students at our place. It was craziness. A definite reminder that I’m not in college anymore. I like to lie to myself and think that I’m still 20 or 22, but these kids have a ton more energy and enthusiasm than I do now. For a night, it was exciting and fun. It also tells me I need to be praying for Ande more often. At one point, I pulled out my guitar, we lit a ton of candles, and we sang a ton of old cover songs. Thomas had his camcorder going, so we might try to upload some of it on youtube later (like I said, I pretend I’m still young). The best is that Thomas was singing along, and so most of what you hear is him. It’s hilarious.

Speaking of UPC, I’ve had the great pleasure the past few weeks of playing in chapel with Jonathan Noel, who is the worship leader over there. The guy is a great piano player, and has a really soothing voice that is just nice to listen to. He’s played with tons of great artists, like Andrew Peterson, Fernando Ortega, Margaret Becker, and Jars of Clay. It’s been a huge honor to collaborate with him on Wednesday mornings, and stay sharp by playing with a guy who’s on the top of his game. That and he’s a really nice guy to boot, which is a huge plus. We’ve also got Chris from Orangewood back at the board, who is amazingly intuitive and easy to work with. The value of a good sound guy should never be underestimated. And he’s got a cute little baby who’s going to kill him later for all the naked pictures that daddy keeps showing everyone.

Today I get to play a little piano for the pre-reception at Jill’s wedding. Basically, that means that I meander around 5 or 6 songs and chord progressions while a bunch of people mill into the room before dinner. I’ll try to throw in some Richard Marx and Michael W. Smith just to see if people are listening. It’ll mostly be just improv tho, where half the time I’ll forget what chord I’m currenty playing. Then I get a free dinner and mack on some bridesmaids like Owen Wilson. Well, not so much on that last part, cuz that movie was actually pretty gross and had a paper-thin plot. But free dinner is always good.

Random side note: I recently got a new edition of Eugene Petersons’ The Message paraphrase. One of my little quibs (quib?) about paraphrase projects like this is that they’re just one guy, typically working from the English, adding liberal doses of his own interpretation on the words of scripture. I was quite surprised to read on the back of the Bible that, not only is Peterson himself a former prof of Greek and Hebrew, but he had his work edited by a good number of scholars. Names like Peter Enns (WTS), Duane Garrett (Gordon Conwell), Tremper Longman, Darrell Bock, Moises Silva (!), and even RTS’ former prof Richard Pratt. Cool stuff.

Another cool thing is that Daniela recently released her CD of original hymns. I’ve been listening to the acoustic demos that she did for a while now, and there are some really good songs on here. I look forwad to hearing the full band arrangements. I think I was supposed to play mandolin on this project at some point, but that never actually happened, which is a little disappointing. Speaking of CDs I wish I played on, the new Red Mountain CD is a recent addition to my collection. These guys continue to amaze. This is the perfect CD for when you need a good spiritual cry. I can’t believe I just typed that last sentence. Damn counseling program, making me all weepy all the time.

I really think I need to read Doug Wilson‘s Federal Husband and possibly Reforming Marriage. Not because I like Doug Wilson. To be fair, I don’t really know if I would like Wilson, as I’ve never read anything he’s written (beyond the occasional blog post). Most people say that he’s a very clever and clear writer, which is why I think he’d be the best person to read on the topic that I’m thinking of. And for those out of the loop (aka the Peninsula), I should say out of the gate that I am not currently thinking about getting married. Please do not check the registry at Target. Just buy me a gift card. Nothing says I love you like a gift card.

Anyway, I’m thinking about reading Wilson’s stuff on marriage, not so much for a view about marriage, but a view about the church. I recently found out that there is a VERY different view of the constitution of the church as a covenant community than the model that I’ve thought of in the past, and it distubs me. Greatly. How disturbed am I? I would describe it as the kind of mad that makes you want to puke in a stranger’s lap. How’s that for a fun little mental image at 11:30 at night?

What distrubs me most is how this sounds so reformed, yet so askew. It starts with the idea of families. God works through families. That’s very covenental. That’s why we presbyterians baptize babies, right? We believe that this model was begun in the Old Testament, and explicitly continues into the New Testament. The promise to Abraham was to him and to his children, and the message of the apostles went from household to household and into all the world. Right? Right?

Well, that’s where the difficulty comes. Notice how I said household up there. This idea that I’m talking about starts with this idea that God has a design for the family, and it is by the family that He shows His ordained order to the world and spreads the holistic message of the Gospel in Christ. And the order in the family begins with the idea of male headship, because the husband is called to love the wife as Christ loved the church, and Christ is the head of the church. So each man is the head (elder) of his respective community of faith.

The role of the local church, then, is to encourage the man as to how to lead his family to the glory of God for the expansion of His Kingdom. This is realized through regular times of family worship and devotions, with the husband and father providing a model of Godly sacrificial servant leadership to those that God has put in his familial charge. The Sunday service is a chance for fellowship, encouragement, and comeraderie as these various communities of faith join together and worship God as a model of the day when all families will be brought together into the perfect heavenly family.

And I think its bunk.

Let me back up again and see if I can show you what I think is my major difference with this model. I stand with the convenentalists in saying that Jesus didn’t just come to save you or to save me. There is no such thing as a lone Christian. God has always worked to redeem a people for Himself. This has always been through families and communities and systems. So the lowest common denominator in Christianity is not the individual believer. The difference between my understanding and the system that I’m trying to understand and describe above has to do with what is the lowest common denominator.

Their answer: the nuclear family. I think that’s a crock.

Why? I’m single.

So was Jesus, so was Paul. Yes, I know that’s a cheap shot and it gets used by singles all the time.

But I’m totally serious here. The reason why Paul appointed elders in each local church was not primarily so that they could instruct men on how to be better husbands and fathers by leading better nightlly Bible studies and encouraging the Children’s Catechism. It’s not. The reason why Paul and the rest of the Apostles instituted the office of elder as a necessary part of the local church WAS to make a statement about the importance of family in the new community of faith. But the new community of faith — the local church — was the new family, the new people of God. This new city was formed from the outcasts and the orphans, those who were not a people and have now become the family of God. Those who were without a father now call God their father.

The local church is not a weekly meeting of various little families of God that get together for some kind of town meeting of sovereign households. The church assembled is itself the family of God, one common household with Godly appointed elders, and we together are connected with the larger body of Christ thoughout the world by the common gift of the Holy Spirit.

And that’s why I want to read Doug Wilson. I want to see if this idea of father-elders that seems consistent with the little I know of Wilson-ites is what I think it is, or if I’m totally off-base. Let me be clear, I’m okay with being wrong on this and misinterpreting people. I’ll happily admit it if I am. Well, maybe not happily. No one is ever happy about being wrong. If you’re happy about being wrong, you’re weird.